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, March 15, 2014

saturday
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i feel restrained with my words. and so, i will write until the awkwardness stop.

sooo,

saturday at home. sis-in-law is not home today.so, i cooked our lunch. i dont really cook at home. i just felt like doing it today. 

fried tofu, fried fish, steamed broccoli, sautéd chayote and carrots and i also cooked rice (without rice cooker). everything tasted just right. i think i can make a good house wife..

i intend to spend the rest of the day reading; or watching j-drama minus the subs to improve my japanese; do some body pampering regimen..anything productive. anything that will cause self-improvement.

the truth is im just feeling lonely.

been browsing facebook. damn, i hate facebook. its like everyone are telling you that, "hey, im better than you", "hey, im happier than you", "hey, i have more in life that you"...and the list goes..

i know its not their fault that im like this. its not anyone else's fault when someone's insecure. i dont know whose fault it is. i think i dont really care.

know what, im not really asking so much in life. ive learned to live within my means..im actually living beyond my means in preparation for my future, and im actually ok with it. my needs are rather scarce to begin with. i think, i just want to be happy. is that so much to ask for?

sighs..i hate sounding like this.

--

tomorrow, im gonna go to the feast. the feast and my wednesday mass were the things that're keeping my sanity intact at times like this. with this, im really greatful. i know this will pass.. i just wish that better days are ahead.

im gonna swim tomorrow too, i found an indoor pool in pasay..or technically just a pool under a roof so that i wont get negrita and all.

maybe we can signup for a connect group too. i wish i have the money to help me create more life. 

--

sighs.. there..

my insides still feel like a sponge being squeezed to extract all  the water out of it.

they say visualization has powers.. so, let me visualize, what i want in life.. what i want for myself.

..

here it goes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

sunday. i will wake up with the delicious aroma of coffee and sumptuous breakfast..

"wake up the kids,hon..breakfast is ready." he will say inbetween singing some song. he sings random songs all the time, sometimes i think he's got massive collections of songs and lyrics inside his head.

i will walk my way to the kids bedroom..will kiss their foreheads and will whisper.."wake up baby, it's time for breakfast"..

they will open their eyes.. say their "good morning, mommy", and then, one of them will go back to sleep, one will sit up and snooze off, and the other one will jump up and down the bed waking the other two..

we will eat our breakfast together. share stories of how  the few days had been. share eachother's plan for the day ahead. and then head back to fix ourselves as we will be going to our sunday mass in PICC.

"so, who's gonna drive the car now?" he will ask.

"you.." i will say with a teasing smile.

"oh, ok".. he will say, smiling back.

and off we will go.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

...

urhg,. i dont know if this is helping.. but this is gotta be all for now.


{ mood } in dreams and prayers..


Written by cinderellaareus at 01:51 PM.

4 comments


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Comment posted on March 17th, 2014 at 12:03 PM
i had goosebumps reading your wants, don't know, maybe i want one also :p
..tara ikain na natin yan
Comment posted on June 4th, 2014 at 03:35 PM
haha..sorry late reaction. now ko lang nabasa to. imbis na ikain naten to, humanap nalang tayo ng lablayp!lols..
pero masarap din naman kumain kaya tara!!!
Comment posted on March 17th, 2014 at 07:26 AM
if i'm correct, there are three components of the law of attraction. first you need to ask what you want, followed by visualization and the last is feeling the presence of your vision by acting as if it is already there. its hard =) but it does work. =) God bless! =)
Comment posted on June 4th, 2014 at 03:37 PM
wow..i will take note of that..i think ive skipped the first step.

God bless to you too and thanks =)

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