水曜日. October 4, 2017

Turning tables and stuff

I know this.

That feeling when your stomach tightens into a knot at the thought of not seeing him there.

Of going crazy knowing that he will be with this other girl (eventhough he said she's someone else's), because you know what presence can do and it drives you nuts.

How you try so hard not to look obvious whenever your eyebrows fly off the ceiling everytime he's talking with another girl. Or girls for that matter.

If it's up to you, you'd want him all for yourself, but you believe that being jealous is so unattractive, so you keep your cool. 

Keeping cool didn't bring you so far back then.... Why insist? Idk.

This is what I hate about allowing someone to hold a place in your heart. These mini tortures that are side effects of caring about another human being other than yourself.

And I thought I wouldn't like you.

Jeez.

----------

Still feeling not fine. Probably bday blues. I know my life is not really as bad as how it feels like. 

I know.

I still wish I feel otherwise though.

I heard from jane earlier about how one shouldn't let the mess inside be projected outside. Good point.

Still thinking if I'd attend the meeting on Fri. I need a bday rest, but my mentee will deliver her 1st speech and I feel bad to even consider allowing her deliver her speech without her mentor. Pero kasi...

I've been feeling so low lately I prefer fewer human interaction. I did see them a few days back though and it went well naman. Idk. I still have a day to decide. Bahala na.

---------

Wait, I need to sleep.

Ciao!


10:34 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。

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