Entries for January, 2025
Ikatlong araw ng taon.
Celebrated Christmas with just Mom and Dad, since Bro and his family went to celebrate in Cavite. It was all good.
New year, kompleto kami.
2019 was my best year ever, lalo na sa financial aspects. So to copy the result of 2019, nicheck ko kung paano ba kami nag celebrate then, and I tried to recreate it nung new year.
I was wearing black spaghetti strap top and green printed silk robe that year. This year, I wore spaghetti strap dress and the same robe, though, tokwa, ang init, so the robe was just resting on the sofa.
Tapos, sinulat ko rin yung mantra ko nung 2019 na nilagay ko sa wall namin. Same mantra, ni tweak lang ng onti.
Nagdagdag ako ng balloons, tas HNY banner, tas more balloons sa table. Naglagay din ako ng 2025 candle same sa ginawa namin ng 2019. Then when the clock hit 12:00, nagpatunog ako ng coins sa buong bahay while shouting "happy new year".
If tama ang alala ko, may work ako ng new year last year, so I probably just slept. This year, I went all out. It felt good, you know. Sabi nga sa nabasa ko, your physical state affects your mental state daw. Kaya siguro making happy posture and happy noise do help make you a little happier.
Nung matapos ang pag-iingay, Mom was like, "tapos, balik na naman tayo sa totoong buhay bukas".
Know what, I've been unemployed since February last year but never once did I miss giving Mom the usual 20,000 monthly na panggastos namin sa bahay. I also buy toiletries on top of that. I also treat them to meals at least once a month. I know we used to eat out weekly, back when I was still employed, but despite some changes, sa tingin ko, it wasn't all bad. I don't know what causes Mom to lose confidence sa finances namin, considering na I still give her the same amount.
It's heartbreaking, you know. I want to give Mom everything. Hindi ko sila na ipasyal sa abroad last year. So, I dont know.
Still, hindi naman siguro need magfocus sa drama and to consider myself a failure for that petty reason. Another year, another chance.
Grateful parin ako sa lahat ng meron. Kahit sa dun sa mga wala. I will still push forward and find a way to improve our lives. Kaya ko to. Kakayanin ko to.
One time, my 4 year old nephew entered the room while I was working on my YT channel. Akala nya nanonood lang ako ng YT so he was like "Nood ka lang ng Youtube, Tita? wala ka work?" So I told him, "mayaman na Tita, di na need mag work". Then he said, "nye, wala nga tayo peya" in his cute voice na mejo bulol, pero cute parin. He's the same as his sister. I remember the niece's reaction upon finding that I no longer work was somewhat similar.
Kaya ko to.
Brother managed to find a work a few months back, so unti unti, bumabangon na silang mag pamilya.
I'm trying to find job too. Pero sana wfh. I want to keep my business, and I want to be able to keep growing my monetized FB page. Nag send ako ng email sa job invitation kahapon. Ayun, walang response.
You know what, I can write an entire list of problems na hinaharap ko now. Promise, ang dami. Pero what for?
Sabi nila, FOCUS ON YOUR DREAMS. FOCUS ON YOUR BLESSINGS.
Alam mo ba, first time kong naka attend ng Christmas recital sa dati kong school. I attended my niece and nephew's recital, and we stayed until evening. Nung nag-aaral pa ko dun, hindi ako pinapayagan ng nanay ko na magpagabi to watch the programs, so ang saya lang to finally experience it this time around.
Also, usually, I spend Christmas and New Year working, pero this year, nasa bahay ako, at nagawa ko pang mag decorate for the occasion.
And then, I still have my parents. My family is still complete. I receive plenty of hugs and kisses from my niece and nephews, and I snuggle with my cats everyday. Sa totoo lang, feeling ko, kaya ko lahat, basta kompleto ang family ko.
When I checked my money in stock market, I still have some money.
I am grateful. I, afterall, have so much to be grateful for.
I know, 2025 is gonna be kinder and easier.
2025 is going to bring more blessings for me and my family.
2025 is going to be a wealthier, healthier, and happier year for me.
2025 is going to be my best year ever.
I am wishing the same for you, Tabby peeps.
05:40 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
It's 4 minutes before 2AM. I am awake, browsing Aglio Olio Recipe.
Know what, I don't usually cook, but I think I make pretty good pasta. But then, I don't remember ever eating a bad-tasting pasta, so maybe, I just have a pretty low standards for pasta since I love it so much.
I'm so having aglio olio for breakfast. But I also want sweet style spaghetti. Let's see which one will win. I hope I won't end up with instant pancit canton. I want real food.
Oh, wow! It's 2:02 AM now.
02:02 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Today, I woke up will multiple violation notifications on Facebook. Said I can no longer monetize my page. This is one of my main sources of income since I've been unemployed.
Haaaaa. Will they take down the page? IDK. It took me 2 years to monetize, so wtf.
Haaaaa. I don't feel so much. It's not that I can feel angry. They own Facebook. They have all the right to restrict me. Well, whatever.
Life's really tough right now, but let's keep going.
09:35 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
I marked my calendar with FJ for days that I'm gonna find job, SJ for days I'm going study Japanese, then TH for days off/reading BL for content for my Facebook page. I put stars on dates when I can't perform any of those three.
I work real hard these days, you know.
This week, 3 days were marked FJ. I spent 3 days seriously sending out applications, pero walang pumansin sakin.
It doesn't help that my language skills seem to be getting rusty. And heck, I really need money.
Ang hirap hindi panghinaan ng loob. Sa ngayon, I just do whatever I can at the moment. Taking it one day at a time.
Hindi pala nakakaproud na you're turning 40 and broke. Tas single ka pa. Lol.
Sa totoo lang, wala akong pake sa ibang bagay ngayon other than money.
This time too, I want to have the best possible outcome.
I want to earn even more than I used to from my previous job.
I want to have enough time for my business and hobbies, my cats and my family, and having enough time to sleep on top of that.
I want to travel again. And I want to bring Mom and Dad with me.
Tas gusto ko ulet kuhanin si Ate Neneng as our helper para hindi na mahirapan si Mama.
Gusto ko ulet mag-ipon at palaguin ulet ang stock portfolio ko.
Gusto kong kumain ulet ng masarap. Gusto kong bumalik ulit sa Okada.
Gusto ko ulet bumili ng bagong damit. I'll buy some for Mom too.
Tas maraming cat food.
At bagong cat tower.
Bagong cellphone at bagong laptop.
Tas gusto ko ng rin sarili kong printer.
Gusto ko na yumaman ulit.
Yung mas mayaman pa.
Yung mayaman, masaya, at malaya.
12:50 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Dad has been wanting XO Hennessey for as long as can remember. For the longest time, I've been checking the wine section of SM. It used to be 8k pesos. Now it's around 13k. I couldn't afford it back when it was 8k. I'm pretty sure I could afford it back when I was still working in my previous company. I should've bought it back when I still can afford it.
I love looking at expensive liquors. I can't drink much, but I like how they look so luxurious. I want to build a bar in my house one day. I want to have pretty liquor glasses of designs appropriate for every kind of liquor. I actually bought a stem less wine glass before. I still have it. It looks so cute, it can't stand upright, always twirling like a spinning top.
I want to collect luxury liquors and pretty liquor glasses. But before that, I'm gonna buy Dad XO Hennessey first.
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I sold a total of 8 items from my shop today. It's the biggest I number in a while, so I'm really happy.
Thanks, Universe. Please give me more.
Please give me a quick and easy 1 million pesos also.
12:41 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
So, I'm sitting at a recruitment hub for a JP hiring event.
A few seats from me, there are people talking fluently in Japanese.
I like this company. I want to get in.
Bahala ka na, Universe.
11:32 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
5:37pm and I'm still here.
Mom went to SM with my brother and his family, without feeding my cats. Huhu. I asked her to feed them as I needed to leave early. I actually fed them before leaving. But they're supposed to get fed again by 12nn. Kawawa naman ang mga pusa ko. TT
I'm kinda having 2nd thoughts about this job. It's Hybrid daw. 3 days wfh, 2 days onsite. Tas 10 hr shift including 1 hr lunch and 30 mins break, so 8.5 hrs work everyday, but still.
Hindi ko alam kung matatanggap ako. All I know is that I really need money now.
Sabi ng nakilala ko dito sa hub, naniniwala daw sya na pag hindi sya natanggap, ibig sabihin, may something better na naghihintay para sa kanya. I believe that too.
For now, I wanna go home and feed my poor cats. Knowing my brother, they'll probably leave the mall untill closing. Tokwa, kawawa naman ang mga pusa ko. Huhu.
05:43 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
"Good news: you passed the project interview."
It was past 7PM nung sinabi yun nung staff ng company. Sabay sabi na sa kabila daw ng JLPT certificate ko e kailangan parin nilang siguraduhing ganun nga talaga ang Japanese language skill level ko at hindi nadaan lang sa tsamba e kailangan daw na mag Berlitz language assessment test daw ako.
Online gaganapin. I heard that test before, pero sa 11 years ko sa BPO industry as a Japanese-Bilingual, hindi ko pa nae experience ang Berlitz na ito. Sabi ito daw ang magiging deciding factor if I'm gonna get hired or not.
More than passing or failing the exam, mas nag-aalala ako na online gaganapin. Sira kasi yung laptop ko. Nagka crash ang browser nya after every 10 minutes or so. Sira na to kahit nung bagong bili palang, tinamad lang akong isoli.
Sabi ng HR hindi daw advisable na sa phone or tablet. Dapat daw laptop or desktop. Hiniram ko yung laptop ng kapatid ko. Intel Celeron. Parang matandang may hika yung laptop. Lol. Mataas yung spec ng sarili kong laptop, pero itong sa kapatid ko, antique na yung spec, pero gumagana.
Haaaa.
Nagtest ako ng mic kanina. Delayed yung boses. Tokwa. Balita ko may oral test daw sa Berlitz at may time limit. Good luck talaga.
At the end of the day, naniniwala ako na kung para sa akin, harangan man yan ng sibat e akin parin.
Tuesday 7PM ang start ng test. Bahala ka na, Universe.
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Sa hiring event last Saturday, kahit hindi ako friendly e marami akong nakakwentuhang tao. All of them were women. Tabang, wala man lang akong naging prospect or kahit crush on that 1 time na lumabas ako ng bahay after a long time of being a hermit. In a way, kasalanan din siguro to ng BL manga hobby ko. The men I see there are hot and handsome, that real-life men can't even compare.
Well, whatever. Saka na siguro ko hahanap ng lovelife pag may trabaho na ko.
06:16 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
I had the language assessment earlier for reading and writing. Mahirap. I thought they were looking for N3 up. Later, I'm going to have the listening and speaking test via zoom. At least, no more Kanji. Gah.
Okay lang. Tomorrow, we're going to have a mini celebration for the CNY. Naglagay na ko ng red balloons na decorations sa sala. Hindi masyado maganda yung balloons na nabili ko, pero keri na.
I started checking the rin for other jobs. Kung hindi para sakin, then I just have to find something else.
Sana maging okay lahat.
05:42 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
I just finished an interview from a recruitment company. They scheduled me for a language assessment tomorrow.
As for the previous company I applied for, I heard that Berlitz releases their result after 2 business days. Since holiday kahapon, maybe the results will be around Monday. Well, I don't know.
Gusto ko ng permanent WFH job.
Gusto ko na yung salary e even just a tiny bit higher than my previous company.
Gusto ko e yung chill at easy lang yung work. Morning shift at walang OT forever.
I want to have a lot of money again. I want to have even more money.
Thanks in advance, Universe!
04:06 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Just finished another language assessment from another company.
Mabait si Kuya interviewer, pero, IDK.
I was asked to read something in Japanese. First word palang hindi ko na mabasa yung Kanji. LOl. But I proceeded and was able to read the rest, though marami paring part na hindi ko mabasa. Ewan kung anong result, so bahala na.
On the other company I applied a week ago, the Japanese interviewer said, "kampeki desu", referring to my answer, which means, "It's perfect". Sure enough, I passed that interview. Kaso, they had me take the Berlitz language assessment, and I didn't perform that well.
Sabi nung Japanese dude na kausap ko kanina, mag aral pa daw ako ng ibang kanji for future interviews. Recruitment company yun, so siguro, pagka endorse ng profile ko sa client nila, baka another interview ulet.
From what I heard, 2 business days daw after ng assessment naglalabas ng results ang Berlitz. Since holiday nung Wednesday, then today is the 2nd day. So I won't hear from day by Monday...
Whatever.
Last night, Dad and I was watching the top 10 most expensive luxury buffet in Metro Manila sa Youtube. I think Dad miss luxery buffet, and maybe travelling too. Mga ganun kasi ang lagi nyang pinapanood lately.
I want to have a high-paying job again so I can treat my family to something nice soon.
Know what, I didnt regret leaving my previous job one bit. I knew that time na that was the only way. If meron akong regret e yung sana hindi ko ginalingan dun sa interview nung lilipat dapat kami sa isang account. Kasi kung hindi ako natanggap, nandun sana ako sa forever wfh na account, where my other teammates who didnt pass were transferred.
Pero siguro, may reason kung bakit nangyayari ang mga bagay bagay.
I get to spend a blissful 11 months at home.
For the record, hindi ako humilata lang sa bahay.
My hands have gotten rough from mopping the floor everyday.
Nagkaron rin ako ng god-tier skill sa pagtitiklop ng damit, that when my 4 year old nephew opened our closet once, he was like, "wow!"
I managed to grow my BL Page, build a business, learn AI.
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Gusto kong matanggap work na chill lang. Yung pwede ako mag aral ng Japanese habang walang calls at chats. Gusto ko rin tumanggap ng malaking sweldo. Kahit a few ten thousands higher lang sa previous job ko.
Mag-iipon ako. I will to build my stock portfolio again.
I will to continue to find other passive income.
I will bring Mom and Dad to luxury buffet. Then, we'll go to Japan. I want to go to Japan at least once every year.
I miss Japan.
Haaaa...
Kaya yan.
04:05 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。