Intramuros between '02-'07.
We were on the walls--the two of us, overlooking the golf course, waiting for Lights and Sounds Museum to open. We were poor college students without a peso under our name. We munched on Skyflakes and some candies as we wait.
Were we happy?
Why, I can't remember anymore.
Our plan this weekend is to roam around MOA, visit Intramuros, and if time allows, maybe we'll go food tripping in Binondo. Brother bought 3 tickets for his family to watch Disney on Ice. Mom's not interested so we'll probably do something else around those hours. I downloaded a map of Intramuros in preparation, along with the schedules of activities happening around. Nandun pa pala yung Lights and Sounds. The heaviness in my chest is still there. I wonder if this will ever go away.
His wife is pregnant now.
01:53 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Saturday. I'm yet to sleep. This effin bus is super slow I wonder if I can save time if I'll just get off here and ride a different bus. I already paid in full.
A lot of things.
Work is getting a whole lot challenging. I didn't care so much back then, but now, tinatablan na ko pag nagagalit yung user. I've been feeling low these past couple of days because of this.
On a lighter note, ang babait ng mga kasama ko sa work. Things are so much better because of them.
Then there are things outside work.
Yesterday, I woke up 4:45pm with messages from different people saying the same thing. Something that makes my heart feel so heavy, I don't really know what to do with it.
Naalala ko yung sabi ng late friend ko na si Cris. Minsan daw kailangan mong saktan ang tao para iligtas sya sa sarili nya. If you care for someone and he's running towards a cliff to his own demise, you gotta do what you gotta do. If he's not listening when you told him to stop, then tackle with him, pin him on the ground, break his leg if you must--all to stop him from destroying himself. I don't know if love is always this complicated. I don't know.
Pero ok lang. Kaya nya yan. I know, kaya nya yan.
I booked a place around metro for my family to stay over tbe weekend next week. I bought a reservation for a dinner cruise for all six of us. Sa totoo lang, gusto ko mag-ipon at mag invest. Para samin din naman talaga even yung pag-iipon at pag iinvest part. Pero naalala ko kasi si Tita Be. She tried bringing Lola out as much as she can when Lola was still alive. But Lola was too old to enjoy it, she couldn't even climb into the car. I'm worried that if I wait till I have more than enough money na e too old na ang parents ko to enjoy the things I want them to experience. So, sige. Bahala na.
Gaaarawr! Napaka traffic. Nakakapikon. Ugh.
10:54 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Last Friday was our club's YEC. This is the first time, since I became a member, na hindi ako umattend. Hindi na rin ako nakaattend ng Club Officer's Training the following day, bilang 6am ang end ng shift ko. 8am-4pm training at malamang tulog ako sa mga oras na yan.
Though I miss hanging out with my people, ok lang naman.
So, I just survived a week in graveyard shift. Not as bad as I thought. Parang nakaka adjust na rin ang body clock ko. Gaya today, kagigising ko lang kaninang 5pm. Malamang, gising ako hanggang mamayang umaga. Ang kagandahan dito e wala na akong oras gumala kaya wala rin akong masyadong gastos.
Sa work part, ok lang rin. Ang daming calls but I can't find myself complaining about it, because I actually like that I'm learning so much. Bukod don, ang bait ng seatmate ko at ang galing pa nya. Since hindi ko pa sya ka close, nahihiya rin ako magtanong. Pero Nakakatuwa na pag nakikita nya kong nag re-research, he'd go like, "anong nireresearch mo dyan?" Then, I wouldn't have to ask na. Tas pag may tanong ako na hindi nya alam, sya na ang nagtatanong kila TL for me.
Mabait siguro ako nung past life ako. Ang babait ng nga taong itinatabi sakin ng langit e.
Another thing na gusto ko sa night shift e yung quietness ng paligid pag lumalabas ka sa gabi/madaling araw. Sobrang ganda. Tapos ang presko pa ng hangin. Kaya siguro hindi ko rin talaga namimiss ang morning shift. Pero kahit ganun, ayoko magtagal sa ganito. Baka lalo akong maging antisocial.
11:28 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
2:59PM and I've been awake for 2 hours already. I'm supposed to wake up at 5. Takte, pagtulog lang ang goal ko sa araw na to, hindi ko pa magawa.
Met up with Mel last night before work to plan our trip. I just learned that some of her friends will join us. See, Mel is a very kind and considerate woman. Tingin ko, hindi nya lang talaga alam na I don't feel comfortable with strangers. Hindi ko nalang din sinabi. Siguro panahon narin para matuto akong makihalubilo sa ibang tao.
Bigla kong namiss si Injan, my favorite travel buddy.
1st day ko bilang night shift kahapon. Someone else is sitting on my usual seat so I needed to select a new one Gelo, who logged off at 9pm, offered me to just sit on the seat he left, saying, "dito ka nalang para may kausap ka". He's so much like PK. When I asked PK saan maganda umupo, he always consider a seat kung saan may makakatabi ako in his recommendations. Sabagay, hindi nga siguro normal sa tao na ayaw ng katabi. I've long known I'm not normal. And really, do I have to? I appreciate these two though. Gelo and PK.
So, I chose a seat just adjacent to the section where the j-speakers sit. Right behind me is TL D. Next to him is PM who's an SME. I wasn't keen on sitting anywhere near D because I thought he's strict and masungit. I learned na hindi naman pala. Feeling ko nga I picked the best seat because of him. Surely, he's strict, pero within reasons naman. Takot ako magtanong dun dati, pero nakakatuwa na accomodating pala sya. Best part e alam nya lagi yung sagot. Feeling ko talaga, best seat ang napili ko dahil sa taong yun. Pero syempre takot parin ako magtanong all the time kasi baka magalit na sakin yun. I still plan to sit next to PK ng Thu and Fri pag naka rest day na yung katabi nya sa upuan. Yun kasi kahit kulitin ko, di naman magagalit yun.
3:24pm. Wala pang 4 hours ang itinulog ko. Good luck in staying up until 6AM.
03:31 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Monday. My graveyard shift month at work has officially started. I forced myself not to sleep last night so that I can sleep by morning, but I only managed to stay up until 3:30am. Woke up 11:30 and I just spent the last 2 hours forcing myself to sleep.
As someone who spent her childhood, teenage years and early adult life as an insomniac, hindi ko alam kung bakit takot na takot akong mapuyat these days.
We have a new j-hire at work. He's half Japanese but has been here in the country for only 6 years. His Filipino is almost native. 29 yo dude who has many hugots, he's really funny, I like him (not romantically, he's just 29). He's into weightlifting and often goes to the gym. When I asked him what's his goal for doing so, he was like, "para makahanap ng forever".
Hindi ko gets. He wants to find a girl (he likes the morena beauty of pinays daw), and yet he stays in the gym (yung bakal gym type na tig 50 pesos bayad). I told him, walang babae dun! Lol. It's been 2 years since he was rejected by the girl he courted for 2 years din. Naawa ako sa batang to, gusto ko sya ipakilala kay Mel. She's a morena beauty, really nice woman. I know her type though. He's probably too nice for her taste, but who knows...
Naisip ko lang din, I'm probably like this dude, naghahanap sa maling lugar, ganern. I saw a meme that say something like, baka daw kaya tayo single e dahil umuuwi tayo kagad pagkatapos ng church service.
I don't even go to church anymore.
02:42 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Spent the day on trips to the laundromat and the bank. Brought home lunch for the boys (Dad and Bro), handwashed some of my clothes because Mom is not around and she hasn't been for a week now. Sis-in-law and niece are in Cavite. Tomorrow, we will pick Mom up from the airport.
Other parts of the day I spent reading a book and eating junk.
It's 11:22pm now and I just spent probably an hour binge watching Twoset Violin and stalking Brett's and Eddie's IG's. Jeez, why do men get 10x attactive when they're talented and famous? And jeez, when will Twoset ever visit here in PH? Are they Japanese? Their surnames aren't Japanese though.
Know what, this girl (myself) actually has a lot of things to do, more pressing things to think of. Our manager just talked to us yesterday about the status of the account. Then there's this message from a TM-related GC, one of our VP's is requesting to take a 3-month long leave of absence...
On a normal day, I'd worry. But here am I watching Twoset.
Tomorrow's problem has to take care of itself, I guess.
11:35 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
9 hrs at work
2 hrs morning prep
2 hrs travel to work
2 hrs travel back home
2 hrs evening prep
7 hrs sleep
My everyday life. I feel like I barely have time for anything else.
I think I heard it from Rex Mendoza's talk, reduce your free time daw. Gets ko. Kasi kung wala kang free time, wala ka rin masyadong gastos. Hindi ko parin napapanood yung Frozen 2. At napaglipasan na ng panahon ang plano kong panoorin ang Charlie's Angels. Well, ok lang naman.
If there are things I'd like to spend more time for, it's hugging my niece and my dogs. It's having lengthy conversation with Mom and Dad over breakfast. Dining out with my friends. Reading a good book and having a me time. Going to the Feast. Eto lang naman talaga.
Sa ngayon, feeling ko, buong oras ko e nakalaan lang sa trabaho. I had to cancel 2 events with the shift that I'll have for Dec. Ok lang naman. Pero sana naman, payagan akong mag leave sa February for my Taipei trip. Nandito pa ba ko sa February?
Pero kung may natutunan ako sa pagiging busy, siguro yun e yung maging straight to the point. I still have TM to think of and decisions are made almost daily. There are members' concerns to respond to, blah blah blah. I used to give people more choices. Now I limit their choices to 2 and often give them time limit to respond. Sometimes I feel like I'm sounding a little demanding na. I'm just thankful that so far, this strategy seems to work fine naman at wala pa namang nag rereklamo. Naalala ko yung book na binasa ko years ago, "the 1-minute manager". It took me n years, but now I'm learning to apply the things I've read there.
Love life? Minsan naiintindihan ko kung bakit hindi pa ko binibigyan ng maayos na love life ng langit. Pero may nagugustuhan naman ako ngayon. Ang lonely naman kung masyado kong busy tas wala man lang pampakilig kahit imaginary lang. Lol. I don't know much about the guy, but I get to see him daily. He could be married for all I know. Well, wala naman akong gagawin. Hahaha.
I love the life I have right now. I still wish I have more time and money, pero ok parin naman at wala parin akong marereklamo sa buhay ko. May mga panahon na naiisip ko na siguro hindi talaga para sakin ang corporate world, pero for now, sa tingin ko, ang trabahong meron ako ay isang napakalaking blessing para sakin.
Teka, malapit na ata akong bumaba ng bus. Ayan na muna for now. Ciao!
11:14 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
I was on sick leave last Thur and Fri. No one believed though that I was sick. And why is that? Lol.
Do you believe that I was sick?
I was planning not to go, you know. Lalo na nga, my boss here is really nice, and I hate lying to people who are nice to me. Pero kasi, I KENNAT!!! I just can't miss this, you know. This event, since 2013, had been the highlight of my year, year after year, after year! Hindi ko kayang hindi pumunta! Juice colored. Huhu. I'm sorry, TL. T_T
So ayun. I went while on "sick" leave. Natatakot din akong mawalan ng trabaho, pero bahala na. Next year, my VL na ko (kung nandito pa ko). Hindi naman na siguro kailangang maulit to.
Sa totoo lang, ang daming magagandang nangyari sa taon na to. Pero ang hirap sabihin na hindi KCON ang highlight kasi feeling ko ito parin talaga. Ansaya kasi e. Feeling ko nagbabago ang pagkatao ko pag uma attend ako ng KCON.
This is the last KCON though. Next year, they'll be calling this FeastCon na. Yes, I already bought a ticket. All smiles.
Ang daming pangyayari. Ang daming gagawin. Graveyard shift na daw ako sa Dec. Sa tingin ko, ok lang naman. Ang di lang ok e ang daming tao dun na di ko kilala. Ang daming tao, period. Sa totoo lang, bukod sa pag-asang maimprove ang love life ko e sumali ako sa TM at Feast para i-improve ang interpersonal skills ko. Yet as time goes by, feeling ko mas lalo akong nagiging antisocial.
But, is it really so bad to be antisocial?
10:21 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
SO, there is this dude I'm interested in. I met him at an event I went to last Sat. I checked his profile and fb and found the we've a lot of common friends who are TM's. Turned out, he's actually a Toastmaster in a club around Mandaluyong.
Kung siniswerte ka nga naman... ^_<
04:23 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。