You're Back
日曜日: March 15, 2020



Ilang araw din kitang di na access, tabulas. Akala ko wala ka na for good. Thank you, Roy Kim, from bringing the site back. Bless you! <3

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Ambigat ng kaganapan sa 2020. And we're still on the first quarter.

Lockdown na ang Metro Manila dahil sa virus. I live in Bulacan. Katatanggap ko lang ng balita na pwede mag work from home sa company namin basta 1) may dsl na internet connection ka, 2) meron kang desktop PC. I don't have both. Sabi ni Yang, it could take 1 month daw para makapagpakabit ng dsl. Mukhang need ko talagang pumasok.

I had a dsat at work. This will drag my score down, when I'm not even doing that good in the first place. This is my first dsat. Ni hindi ko matandaan kung sino yung user sa dami ng tawag na nakukuha ko sa night shift. Ayoko na rin personalin pa. Siguro pagod lang rin sila, gaya ko. Iniisip ko lang, baka ma stuck na ko neto sa night shift.

Pero alam mo, sa kabila ng kaguluhan na to, nananatili parin akong positive sa trabaho ko dahil kay D---yung bago kong crush. O di ba, sumasaya talaga ang buhay pag may lalaking involved. Lol.

Gwapo si D. Isa sya sa mga TLs namin. Magaling sya, matalino. Hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi ko nagustuhan to dati kahit na papasa sya bilang type ko. Siguro dahil mejo strict sya. Pero lately, parang ang lenient nya na sakin. Naaawa narin siguro dahil late na rin kaming nakakapag lunch sa dami ng calls daily. Iniisip ko lang, ngayong may work from home option na at dahil techy si D, for sure may dsl yun kaya malamang nagwo work from home sya. Wala nang pangpa brighten ng araw ko sa office. Oh well... 

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Ung isa kong crush, last day na sa company on Monday. Hindi kami magkikita for sure dahil nga panggabi ako. Sobrang thankful ako sa taong yun dahil sya ang nag hire sakin. Sana maging ok ang lahat sa lilipatan nyang work. 

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Pabilis ng pabilis ang pagtaas ng cases ng COVID-19 sa Pilipinas. Kung nasan man ang future husband ko, sana ok lang sya at hindi sya tamaan ng virus, kasi, Lord, hindi pa kami nagkikita.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 06:22 PM.

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Do
日曜日: March 8, 2020



 If it costs you peace of mind, it's too expensive.

There is this person that I want to keep out of my life.

Sa kahit anong klaseng relationship, lagi naman na yung nagka cut ng ties ang nagmu mukhang masama. Siguro ako nga yung masama, but be it. 

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May pasok ako tonight because of slide shift. Hindi maganda yung hot air balloon event na napuntahan namin. Sumuko kami sa sobrang init at tumabay at nagpa aircon nalang sa kotse. 

A and J were left on their own though. Mukhang na enjoy naman nila. The girl claims that she's yet to move on from her ex but her actions towards the guy display otherwise. As for the guy... hmmm... iba talaga pag may gusto ang lalaki sa babae no? Because if so, you'll know. He'll let you know. I think J found a good one. Wala naman bitterness sa part ko. Maybe konting inggit lang. Bihira na kasi yung lalaking mag eeffort ng ganyan.

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Woke up today with *'s message. I remember him saying the other day, "hindi mo naman ako pinapansin e". I don't know what to do with this person. It's been a while. I feel like I already forgot how to flirt. He doesn't have a car. He doesn't match A's salary. I'm not sure if he has the intellect to boot, but he do have a good taste in music. I can't say I'm interested, but I'm feeling kinda lonely right now.

Paano nga ulet mag flirt? Babae pa ba ko?



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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:05 AM.

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Wut
: March 6, 2020



I asked our TL na mag split off ako this week dahil sasama akong gumala with our officemates, hoping she'll say 'no" because I really want to sleep this weekend.

She said yes. Hahaha!

Oh sya! Let's do this.

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1am ang lunch time ko. 3:27am ako nagpaalam kumain. Walang avail but I insisted na dapat 1am pa lunch ko. Buti pumayag si PM. Malapit ko nang kainin tong keyboard.

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Gutom na ko. Ano na, Shakey's.

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I miss my family. I've been going home on an empty house for days now. Parents were having hospital trips for Dad's operation. Niece is in Cavite. Sis-in-law in the hospital. Brother at work. Dog Gigi gone. Ilang araw na kong nalulungkot.

Pero ok lang. I comfort myself to the fact that I still have my family. They're just not around now. Well, except Gigi. Nakakalungkot...

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Wahhhh! Shakey's!!! ANO NA????!!!!!



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Written by cinderellaareus at 03:47 AM.

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Migrainetion Migration Migraine
木曜日: March 5, 2020



Pangatlong araw ko palang sa night shift pero yung pagod ko, kumo quota na ng isang buwan. Pag sakay ko ng jeep, muntik ko nang sabihin sa driver, "Manong, can you grant me access to your screen?"

Takte. Awat naman na sa dami ng calls, Universe.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 06:34 AM.

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土曜日: February 29, 2020



Just got home and couldnt help but cry because Gigi is no longer here to greet me. This is the first time that I cried since Mom texted me na wala na si Gigi yesterday. I miss my Gigi so much. 

Ilang minutes palang ako nakakaupo sa sofa when sis-in-law texted Mom that she needs to be admitted in the hospital daw. The doc said that if her BP will keep on going higher, sis-in-law might need to deliver my nephew prematurely.

Then there's Dad's operation to be scheduled for on Monday. I'll only recieve 1-day pay for the next cut off.

Ok lang. Kaya to. Pero pwede, wag naman sunod sunod, Universe.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 03:40 PM.

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Dark Clouds
金曜日: February 28, 2020



I'm back to work, alright. Nothing seem to have changed. Makukulit parin ang mga kasama ko sa trabaho. I'm good and happy.

Except, when I'm alone, there's that dark cloud hovering on top of my head, and there's that heaviness in my chest, I don't know what to do with.

You see, my dog, Gigi, died today.

Just a year ago, she got so sick and was dying but somehow survived. I asked the Heavens to lend her to us some more, and the Heavens did. But this time, I asked and asked for extension... but Mom texted, wala na daw e. Wala na si Gigi.

I don't know. Universe... bakit po?



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Written by cinderellaareus at 01:53 PM.

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1236
木曜日: February 27, 2020



It's 36 minutes past midnight. No tik tik tik sound whatsoever. All good. In a few hours, I'll be visiting the doctor to get a clearance to get back to work.

I was chatting with Mel a few days back. Sabi nya napapaisip daw sya kung gusto nya yung trabaho nya. Halos isang buwan kasi syang hindi pumasok, pero hindi nya naman daw namiss.

Namiss ko ba ang trabaho ko?

Ewan ko. Ang alam ko lang, kinakabahan ako dahil sabi ng isang ka officemate ko, ang dami na daw nadagdag sa trabaho namin. Methods at work are ever-changing. Laging may nababago or nadadagdag sa KB namin. Kinakabahan ako na baka mangamote ako pag balik ko sa trabaho. Lalo na kung maibabalik na ko sa panggabi. Jusko Lowrd!

Hindi ko alam kung namiss ko ba ang trabaho ko. Ang alam ko lang, Jusko, nagpapanic na ko! T_T

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Kain-tulog days. Iniisip ko kung kasya pa ba sakin ang mga damit ko.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 12:45 AM.

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Wednesday
水曜日: February 26, 2020



Malapit na kong bumalik sa trabaho. Hindi pa rin ako payat. Huhu! T_T

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Fellowship night on Friday in our club. Videoke daw. I already confirmed my attendance. But Boss sent a message today saying may plan to eat out daw sa office, asking if sasama ako. Friday din, and I said yes also.

I'm very close to the people in the club. I love them like a family. But I also want to get to know the office people better. Bukod dun, aalis na rin si Boss. Gusto ko muna sila makasama. Hahabol nalang siguro ko sa club. The 21-year old kiddo requested this kind of event. I want to know kung magaling talaga syang kumanta. Nakakatawa he made a joke time poster about the event kunyari "album launching" containing a picture of me from more than 10 years ago. Lol.

But this is a good problem, isn't it.

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Dad is  done with all the necessary lab tests. We're waiting for results on Friday. By Monday, pwede na syang operahan. He seemed considerably happier these days knowing na hindi na namin kailangang maglabas ng 81k. The cost of the whole procedure, including the laboratory tests, is more or less 10k lang in a public hospital, so all good. Thank you, Universe!

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Sis-in-law is pregnant. CS sya so they can pick the date of the baby's birth. Around early May, I'll be having my first ever nephew. I'm more than excited.

But recently, weird things had been happening in the house. We've been hearing bird-like sounds at night and sometimes room doors are opening by itself. I, too, am hearing that "tik, tik, tik" sound whenever I go to the bathroom downstairs around past 12 mn. Tito Leo gave Mom some branches which he instructed to be put on the doors and windows. This will prevent any aswang daw from getting near. Mom also instructed sis-in-law never to leave their room alone if she needs to pee. Mom told her to always wake up Bro and bring him with her. 

Hindi ako masyadong naniniwala sa aswang, pero natatakot parin ako para sa pamangkin ko. Konting kembot nalang at lalabas na sya. Sana naman, maging maayos ang lahat.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 02:20 PM.

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1238
火曜日: February 25, 2020



I'm just a little bothered. Nothing serious naman.

A friend announced to our ladies' GC her happiness about her club being able to open a bank account under their club's name. Said the maintaining balance is 50k and all of these, they got from their club fund and a kidney daw. I immediately thought the 'kidney' part was a joke.

We congratulated the friend. But the math-loving kiddo in me felt restless. I got a calculator and started computing. Theirs is a relatively new club and an even smaller one. Even with the size of my own club, I knew it's impossible to have a 50k fund. So I asked, "seryoso yung kidney?"

The friend didn't confirm but said something like, "kailangan kasi e." I think this is outrageous and utterly impractical. Things felt off because that friend doesn't seem to be someone who do impractical things. I still can't rest. But if the friend is happy... go nalang siguro. It was then that she said, "hindi pa pala kumpleto 50k, need pa namin ng isang kidney."

Then followed... "baka gusto nyo mag donate ng pusong hindi nagagamit." Lol. I felt attacked.

I love my girls, you know. I still think that they should've used the money for something else though. The bank account, after all, doesn't have any other purpose other than to recieve money, which they'll be sending to the international website soon enough anyway. Hindi ko ma gets. Pero hayaan na natin.

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Few days and I'll be back to work. Parang ang dami nang nagbago sa setup sa trabaho. Hindi ko alam kung paano ako magsu-survive. Lalo na pag nalipat nako sa panggabi. Hayst... help, please, Universe.

Aalis na yung TL namin soon. Mabait din naman yung papalit. Siguro magiging okay naman. Pero nakakalungkot pa rin. From what I know, open pa ang QA. Sana mapunta kay PK. Wala lang. Para masaya. Naalala ko lang yung interview ko nung nag aapply pa ko rito.

TL: matagal ka sa dati mong company, what made you stay?

Z: the people are nice.

TL: mabait din ang mga tao rito. Magugustuhan mo rito.

Tapos ngayon, aalis sya. Ano kaya yun?



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Written by cinderellaareus at 12:40 PM.

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C I N D E R E L L A A R E U S
"A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep"

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私の名前はZです。

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