guess i counted wrong. i just checked the calendar and realized i still got 3 weeks before the contest. dont know if that knowledge helps because right now i just feel so lazy for anything.

the battle plan, since i still have 3 weeks, is to work on my english first for the first week and then work on my evaluation skills on the remaining two. i dont know why my motivation level had suddenly took a plunge.

---

i am sad. i wonder if you were saving me all along. i should've listened. i didnt.

and really, what's the point of chasing something you cannot get?

of chasing ONLY the things you cannot get...

ive once read an article about emotional unavailability... devoured the words with much familiarity.

shoot, what can be worst than self-sabotage?

bahala na nga..

siguro ang sign ng maturity e yung pag nagbabago na ang prayers mo.

my prayers usually go like, "i want ___, please give me ____."

i remember wanting something so much it hurts. and it hurts because you dont really want to get it right away. because if it matters, then you would want to be worthy of having it first, before actually having it, right?

so maybe a matured way to pray would be, "I want ___. If it's good, if it's part of Your will, please prepare me for this. Once I'm ready (or 'once we're both ready' if it involves another person), please let me have____. But only when i'm ready.."

..

nalulungkot ako pag naiisip kita. baka kasi mali na naman ako.

kung sakali mang tama ka--or tayo... sana ihanda tayo ng panahon para rito...

at kung sakaling mali na naman ako....well, hindi ko na alam.

03:22 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。

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