I look like a frog today. Had a crying fiesta at the grand feast yesterday so my eyes are all swollen. Grabe, sinipon ako dun. I normally cry sa feast and Wednesday mass ko, but yesterday was a little different. Bro. Bo explained why Jesus had to die and the different meanings that we used to associate with it. Nakakatuwa lang na nasagot ulet ung mga tanong ko before. I'm no religious and there are things I don't agree with na nasa Bible. Still, I think in a way, I developed a certain relationship with my God. He's silent most of the time, pero pag nagsisimba ko or pag nagfi-feast, alam kong sinasagot Niya yung tanong ko. Yun ata yung nakakaiyak na part. Yung malaman at maramdaman ng mahal ka rin ng Existence na mahal mo kahit hindi mo nakikita. I remember there was a point in my life when I asked myself if niloloko ko lang ba yung sarili ko in believing in something that may not be real afterall. I tried and only lasted being an atheist for a couple of days before going back to Christianity (Catholicism to be exact). Feeling ko kasi mawawalan ng saysay lahat kung walang Diyos. That was the day I told myself, screw it. Bahala na kung hindi totoo. E eto yung gusto kong paniwalaan. I think minsan kailangan din talaga naten kumapit sa isang bagay or idea n paniniwalaan naten till the end. Masaya ako sa naging choice ko. 

Si Jane, si Lourdes, si S*. Yan ang listahan ng taong hiningi ko sa Diyos at binigay nya right to my last specification. 

Trivia: S* is my partner at work. When the previous native Japanese I worked with left the company, I asked God to give me a new work partner who can speak English and tagalog para hindi ako araw araw na nano-nose bleed. Sabi ko gusto ko yung lalaki, gwapo at interested or ginagawa yung mga bagay na interested ako. Then there came a half Japanese half Korean dude who speaks fluent English and Tagalog, was a former radio DJ(I dreamed of becoming a DJ before) and was doing hostings as a sideline. And yes, gwapo. I mean, grabe si God di ba? Right to the last specification talaga. 

Pag naaalala ko to, lalo akong na eencourage na wag nang awayin ulit si s*. Lol. 

I have a prayer I've long been praying to the Heavens. Now I know that the God who gave me miracles before is still the same God. Kung mabuti para saken ang hinihingi ko, hindi Nya yun ipagdadamot. 

Ooops, shoot, naiiyak na naman ako. Hahahaha. Basta. 

I just feel super better now. I thank God for bro. Bo. isa syang malaking blessing para saken. 

11:40 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。

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