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Tuesday, November 6, 2018

Juuichigatsu

7:50am, breakfast at the cage. I haven't slept much last night and my eyes sear. Kelan nga ang weekend?

Yesterday, someone asked me, "naramdaman mo na ba yung masakit yung puso mo na nagta tighten talaga yung dibdib?" The question was that of a health concern, but all I can think about was the tightness I've been feeling for the past 4 months. Is 4 months enough?

I haven't been crying that much, you know. I did cry... only a few times. But my heart has been so heavy all this time that sometimes it surprises me that I'm even standing.

A few days back, someone told me, "shucks ang sakit non!" Thinking I was hurt/offended from a supposedly offensive comment. I just smiled and proceeded with the convo like nothing happened. Because really, I didn't feel anything.

I've been going through probably one of my most painful times that if someone wishes to hurt me, he got to do a way better job than that.

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Ang daming ganap ng November. I have a customer who has been setting out to meet me for the last 3 weeks, but the weekends had been so overbooked, hindi ko sya masipot. Kung kelan kailangan ko ng pera.

There's the transfer. There's KCON and now, there's the SME thingy that was supposed to happen in October. Tentative date is on 21st. Weekday. It will probably be harder to take a leave by then since I'm not sure if Partner will still be here by then. Will I still be here by then? Ewan ko. Bahala na. This is my hope for a better future. There's no way I'd miss this. Takte. Lord, help me.

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Dad operation on 17th. Minor lang naman daw, but my praning self can't help but think of the worst, I started having bad dreams. Sana maging maayos ang lahat.

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After this month, I think December wouldn't be so hectic. Gusto ko ng full body massage. 



Written by cinderellaareus at 08:25 AM.

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