Daijobu daijoubu
火曜日: January 11, 2022



Ikatlong araw na magmula ng huminto ako sa pagkain ng matatamis. Zero sugar/artificial sugar, zero fruit, zero fried food. Paksiw at sabaw lang ang ulam ko lagi, tapos tsaa at tubig lang ang drinks. 2 days back, nagluto ako ng spaghetti na walang asukal. Masarap pa rin naman. Nalungkot lang ako na di rin ako makakain ng tinapay. I love tinapay.

On the 2nd day, I've lost about 1 kilo. Pero today, I have the exact same weight as yesterday. 

I've been reading Ted's earthclinic archive on cancer. Sinusubukan kong sundin yung mga recommendations nya. Hindi ko alam kung hanggang kelan ko mapapangatawanan to.

Feeling ko, hindi naman ako takot ma deds. Ewan ko kung anong point in trying to be healthy. But then again, wala namang mawawala. Mas makakatipid pa ko dahil di na ko bibili ng junk food at kakain sa labas.

Mom doesn't plan to get operated. Injection nga lang nanginginig na yun, opera pa kaya. Ayoko rin syang pilitin lalo na't sabi ng doc, sa age nya, may risk na magka cardiac arrest sya during operation, kahit na ma clear nya pa yung cardio check up. Baka mas mapadali pa ang buhay nya kung magpapa opera sya.

We've been taking some herbal meds recommended by my tita. Dito daw kasi nawala ang mga bukol bukol ni Tito sa katawan. I've checked the ingredients myself, at wala naman dun yung mga ingredients na sinabi ni Ted na dapat iwasan, so sabi ko, go na.

Basta walang sugar, walang calcium, keriboom.

If my mom wouldn't get operated, why would I? Hindi na rin ako nagpabiopsy. Parami rin kasi ng parami ang COVID these days, at malayo ang East ave. Sa totoo lang, I feel neutral about my own situation. Ang concern ko lang, if I get so sick, who will find a way to get money for my mom in case she decides to proceed with the operation? I know my brother will never abandon our parents, but I also know that he doesn't earn so much, and he has a family to feed. It has to be me.

Pero okay lang. Mom thinks living for 64 years is enough already. I also think the same at 36. Siguro ganito yung "surrender". 

2 days since we met with the doc, alam kong hindi nakakatulog ang mama ko. Though mom doesn't snore, she sleeptalks daily, as in walang mintis. Pero 2 days since the appointment with doc, tahimik syang matulog. That's why I knew she weren't sleeping. I felt a little relieved dahil last night, nagising akong may inaaway na naman ang nanay ko sa panaginip nya. I'm glad that my mom is starting to sleep normally again.

Alam ko, magiging maayos din ang lahat.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 05:51 PM.

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C I N D E R E L L A A R E U S
"A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep"

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私の名前はZです。

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