Entries in category "水曜日"

水曜日. June 28, 2023

Ashita wa

I'm gonna get back to work tomorrow though I'm still sick. I hate being sick. Siguro konti lang ang namamatay sa ubo't sipon, but I really hate this feeling.

Ano na kayang balita sa bagong account? Kelan kaya ako pipirma ng bagong contract with HR? Sana magaling na ko by the time makalipat ako sa bagong account. 

I announced to my friends na posibleng Sat-Sun na off ko by July. They started planning on meeting. I'd love to see my friends, pero tamad na tamad akong umalis ng bahay.

I left our TM GC sa messenger. I was suprised that a friend mentioned about it a few days after I did it pa. I don't hate TM. I had fond memories with the people I met in there. Pero naalala ko yung pagod. At sa ngayon, parang ayoko ng extra stress. Gusto ko rin gumawa ng paraan para matupad ko na yung pangarap ko makawala from corporate slavery. Gusto kong mag focus dun. Ano bang gagawin ko?

I feel so fed up about so many things. Siguro dahil din sa masama ang pakiramdam ko. Natatawa lang ako sa ilang mga taong nag memessage sakin before. Haaaaaah. Sa tingin ko, finally, hindi na ko drawn towards unrequited love.

04:18 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。


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水曜日. September 7, 2022

Otoshiyori ni natta

Doc said my lab results were good, so the pain in my knees was not gout nor arthritis. My kidneys and liver were good too. She concluded that this was because of my weight. I understand that it could be the reason for the knee pain, but what about my hands?

IDK. I guess I really need to go on diet. 


Back to work tomorrow. Everything feels quite irrelevant lately. I want a little action.

07:57 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。


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水曜日. August 31, 2022

Kutsu no kaihodai

I've been developing a really bad habit lately. In a span of 1 week, I've bought 7 pairs of footwear already. The shoes were all around 3k and above. The priciest of which was the one I bought today at around P6900+. 4 pairs were for my parents. The rest were mine. I paid for all 7 pairs, of course. It's kinda ridiculous seeing parents wearing P1800+ worth of tsinelas at home. Oh well, as long as they're happy...

But, jeez... I need more money.


Powerful daw ang words...

Basta, bago matapos ang taon na to, I'm going to earn net passive income of 1 million pesos monthly. 

And have a sweet, sexy and handsome boyfriend, maybe?


Been slacking off at home all the time, it's totally lame. But I'm too lazy to go out. I have lab rat duties again next week, and there's also APE. I hate APE.

The battle with Robert is still ongoing. Escalating my every move has become his habit. It's happening almost daily. He does the same to other people from the team, it's really annoying. I've been thinking of reporting him to HR for indirect bullying and harassment, but I'm too lazy to submit a report. 

My officemates are busy looking out for his wrongdoings though, I don't really have to do the reporting myself most of the time.

Well, I don't know. Fighting back and retaliating is too much work. It's not like he can really harm me, no? One of his false reports got reflected on my appraisal though...

Pero, ewan. Bahala na.

Gusto ko nalang yumaman, so I can just get out of here and not have to deal with him anymore.

07:53 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。


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水曜日. August 4, 2022


Today was quite painful. I brought my cat to the vet for a surgery, and it's the first time that the vet ever asked me to go to the operating room to discuss something over. I was already nervous because my cat was shrieking after the operation, and she was hurting herself, scratching her own face — behaviors I've never seen in my other cats who've undergone the same operation before. The vet explained what happened. My heart feels heavy. I know it could've been worse. Oh gawd. Sana maging okay lahat.

I've been worrying a lot these days. The account's contract expires every 2 years, so we do not know yet if we're gonna get renewed. It's because of this job that I can feed my cats and provide enjoyment and medical needs for them. This is also the reason why I have the money to treat my parents a whole lot more often that before. I'd be really in trouble if I lose this job, so we're crossing fingers.

Urgh. I want to be so rich, that losing job won't ever bother me anymore.

But still, thank you for this job, Universe. 

01:04 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。


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水曜日. June 22, 2022


It's barely 2 months since RTO started and I already bought 5 lipsticks. Before Pandemic, I think I got about 12. 

Jeez, should stop this. 


Will be going back to work tomorrow. I feel like my rest days had just passed me by, I didn't even feel it.

I want more sleep.

07:19 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。

3 コメント

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水曜日. June 15, 2022


12:51AM, gising pa ko.

Will be meeting the girls 6PM. A little earlier with Mel at 5:30. We'll be spending 12 hrs sa spa, so I told my parents na sa Thursday na ko uuwi. Hectic din since nagpa sched ako ng nueter for one of my cats mamayang 8AM.

Anu ba, gising pa ko. Huhu.

Mel plans to go ice skating tomorrow. I'd rather go home and take care of my then newly neutered cat. I also feel homesick just thinking that I won't be sleeping on my own bed tonight.

Pero di ba, hindi naman pwedeng ganito ako lagi. I need to go out.

01:00 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。


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水曜日. May 18, 2022


Meguri, my former JP boss from prev company, sent me a message saying that he's now working in the same company as mine, only, he's in Yokohama. 

I owe so much to that guy. He helped me a lot, and kept helping me even long after he left the company,  and even after I also left the company myself. It appears like we'll be having the same job. It's weird to be the sempai of my former boss.

He's as friendly as ever. I told him that he can ask me anytime about work as I hope to be able to help him this time around. Sa totoo lang, sobrang laking blessing sakin ng taong yun. I don't think I can ever do enough to repay his kindness. I hope he'll get to be friends with my other teammates as well. He's super friendly. I'm pretty sure he'll get to like my teammates. Partly e para hindi ako lang yung kinukulit nya. Haha. I'm more that willing to help him out with work, but his kwento can go on forever, so it will be better he'll have othet people to chat with.

Naisip ko lang... sablay man madalas ang love life ko, nabless naman ako ng universe ng mga amazing na tao like Meguri around me. Alam kong maiirita na naman ako sa haba ng mga kwento nya at mga kulang sa hulog na banat, but I'm still glad having Meguri around again.


I like that kiddo. We only get to meet 3x a week as we have different rest days. Heck, I didn't even see him last Monday eventhough we were both on-shift (was glued on my PC as there was an outtage that affected a lot of JP users).

Jeez, how can I get closer?

11:31 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。


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水曜日. May 11, 2022


Diode sched today. Armpits can finally breathe, though only for about 3 days, maybe. Then, another 6 weeks to the next session.

Still plagued with this growing dissatisfaction. 

An officemate introduced me to this online shopping app for clothes. I want to try different outfits. Denim pants are a pain in this heat. I tried out clothes after the diode session today, I didn't like any.

I felt like I've lost a few inches off my waistline. I want to lose more. I haven't heard from Mel regarding the plan to travel somewhere. She works for one of the leading TV Networks in PH. She must be busy, with the election and all.

I miss being busy. Though I barely have time for anything as I spend most of my waking hours with work and daily commute, I still miss actually being busy on more meaningful stuff.

The world is starting to go back to normal. I heard the face to face classes will start on Monday. I miss the action and the fun. I want to go back and do more.

I remember the conversation I had with some my workmates who were also on a weekend shift. I told them how different they are from my usual circle and on how I find it interesting. 

I feel like there's so much to discover. About ourselves, about other people, about the world. Sobrang dami.

I know the cause of my dissatisfaction. I want to end this as soon as possible. I feel like getting this will complicate things and may prevent me from my desire to discover... I hope not. I hate restraint.

I hate restraint...

I hate... jeez, I just remember, Marcos is winning the presidential race.

I'm sad. Also a little scared. I understand that it can't be helped as this is how democracy works. 

I remember in a management book I've read before. Said if you were to hire someone with questionable character, you have to make sure that he's super lazy and stupid. It would be great if he's actually lazy and stupid. We'll just have to wait until his term is over and hope that another chance for a better governance will come. 

Night of the election, I was looking at the wall of our kitchen, contemplating if migrating elsewhere will be a good idea.

What's the worst to happen?

I'm not scared of dying. I don't want my family to die. And I hate restraint. I HATE RESTRAINT. 

I hate it. I hate it so much. Tangina. He better be lazy and stupid. Sighs.

Okay. Let's calm down. I want to focus on the things that are within my control. I've just been slacking off all these time though.

I've been reading too much BL, I sometimes forget straight men exist.  Haha! Oh wait, do they?

Gah! I've got so much to do.

12:35 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。


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水曜日. March 30, 2022


Took an SL today to see a dentist, only to find out that they were fully booked. Got myself sheduled late April. To kill time, I went to the next mall, and somehow ended up in a skin clinic having some diode treatment thingy. It's like an IPL, but more advanced. Killed 4k in 1 sitting. It will cover a total of 4 sessions though, and a few products, so, not bad na. I should've done this way before RTO. Said I'm not allowed to do anything with my armpits. Ang hirap magiging babae no?

But if I am to be born again, I'd still wish to be a woman. Well, only for the prevelidges. But being a man doesn't sound so bad too. I think it's so much less hassle.


I remember a long time ago, at school. There was this physical exam thingy. To save time, the attendant physically examined a number of women in one go. Chest exam.

I was mixed with this woman from the same dept. We never really talked much, she was just someone I knew.

Few days after the physical exam, the girl went up to me to profusely say sorry. Said she didn't know we're going to get mixed at the physical exam. I absolutely had no idea what was there to be sorry about, but at that time, she looked so kawawa being apologetic like that, so I said, it's all fine. Later, someone told me that the girl liked me.

What's kakko warui in English? I do not know how that is supposed to be translated, but that was how I felt. I mean, it hurt my woman's pride. Like, do I look like a man, to be liked by a woman? Lol.

I still don't understand why she said sorry that time. I mean, it wasn't her fault that we were told to undress. And we both have it. We both saw it. So, what's the big deal?

Anyway, maybe there are just still a lot of things that I do not understand in this world. And at this age, my experience in that department is still not much different from a fetus. It's kakko warui, you know.

There are so many things I want to understand.


Had one of my cats scheduled for kapon tomorrow. I still remember the trauma I went through the 1st time I had my other cat neutered. If I have a better choice, I will never resort to this. Sana maging maayos ang lahat. Sana maging safe ang pusa ko.


Time will pass even if I won't do anything, no? I think I might as well give it a try. My fear is to spend time, tears, and effort, then fail to get it in the end. Or, manage to get it, then realize that I don't want it afterall.

Well, ewan, bahalanaa.

I just don't want to be the same anymore.

02:32 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。


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My name is Z. Let's get along :)





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