Entries in category "Wednesday"
Sabi ko kagabi, maaga akong matutulog tonight. 930 na, hindi pa ko nakakapag-ayos. Tamad na tamad ako lately.
Do you remember when was the last time your heartbeat raced inside your chest ? I just had that this morning. I know my patterns. I know what excites me so much, my heart somersaults. I don't know why I'm not doing anything about it.
Kaya ko gustong magkaron ng maraming pera e para magawa ko na ang mga gusto kong gawin. Ang weird na pinipigilan ko ang sarili kong gawin ang mga gusto kong gawin dahil sa wala pa kong maraming pera. Kailangan ko ba talaga ng pera para magawa ang mga gusto ko?
So, I see that you're meeting a lot more women recently. A part of me wonders if you now realized that you can't find anyone else like me. They could be greater than me in an aspect or so, but I know what you're looking for and I have all that. I know I'm still the only one perfect for you.
Naks, spell confidence. Lol.
Most of what I'm looking for, you have too. Still, I don't want to do anything about it right now. I don't want to put shackles on someone I'm not even sure I could keep.
Seems like you forgot.
Be careful with your metaphors, Z.
Nakakakaba pag sinabing "keynote speaker". Kailangan ko yata ng mas matibay na puso.
Written by cinderellaareus at 10:14 PM.
It's 10:18pm. There are things to do, but here I am, sitting on my favorite swivel chair as I type this. Just like earlier when I was riding the bus, my phone was beeping, but the moon and the night sky were so beautiful, I didn't want to miss a moment of it. I ignored my phone and admired the night sky instead. Truth is, I was trained to jump into doing seemingly urgent things... but lately, I'm changing, and I'm liking it. I think I just want to put priority to what really matters.
Years ago, Fr. Mario mentioned in his homily about the promises of Jesus to Sister Faustina. I remember I thought of researching about it, and it took me years to actually do so.
I just read it today. 17 things that Jesus revealed to Sr. Faustina about the Divine Mercy. As I was reading it, narealize ko lang na ang sweet sweet din talaga ni Jesus.
"I want to save them all," he said.
He also said na the more na grabe yung mga kasalanan mo, kahit kasing dami pa ng mga buhangin, mas lalong malaki yung karapatan mo para sa Kanyang Mercy. Minsan ang hirap din talagang hindi mahalin ang Diyos no. Sobrang bait Nya naman kasi.
Hindi naman ako madaling maapektohan pag jina-judge ako ng iba, pero just to be sure, I saved the link sa bookmark ko para sakali mang husgahan ako ng iba sa mga bagay na nagawa at hindi ko ginawa, maaalala ko na si Jesus, unli ang Mercy, unli kung magpatawad.
Naalala ko yung paborito kong chapel sa Megamall. Sa loob kasi ng office na katabi ng main chapel, meron pang maliit na chapel na madalas kong tambayan kapag nalulungkot o naguguluhan ako. Sa maliit na chapel na yun, may picture ni Jesus na sobrang gustong gusto ko. Akala ko dati, sacred heart ang tawag dun. Kay Jenny ko lang nalaman na yun pala yung Divine Mercy. Mahal na mahal ko yung image na yun. Pag pumupunta ko don, minsan ididikit ko lang yung noo ko sa picture ni Jesus at kumakalma ko tas natatagpuan ko yung peace. Nakakatuwa na all those times, ayun na pala yung Divine Mercy.
Every day that passed since the week started felt like Friday to me. I'm reading my Toni Robbins book. I should be writing posts for my businesses, or buying ads, but I guess I want to slow down for just a bit. Do very little and then see how things pan out.
Same sa love front. Do very little, see what will work out, and then from there, decide. If things don't work, then we can all just move on and proceed to the next.
I want to keep things as simple as possible. Incur the littlest damage possible-to myself, to the person involved. After all, feelings are investment too. You've got to dream big, but start small.
I will have considerably more time this coming month. I want to use this time to expand my world. Gabby have a lot of club hopping sched jotted on his calendar. I might join him on some of these.
Naalala ko yung sabi ni Sis Rissa noon. Naisip nya daw dati na sakali man na dumating yung time na nasa point na sya ng buhay nya na wala na talaga. Na hindi nya na makukuha yung gusto nyang makuha, at least daw, she can look back and say, "Lord, at least I tried."
Well, ako rin. I also want to at least try.
Written by cinderellaareus at 11:07 PM.
Z: Hello Ma'am, kamusta po kayo? May nagustuhan po ba kayo sa brochure?
Cust: Hello! Okay naman ako.
Z: *so, ano 'to, kamustahan?*
Z: Hello *insert name here*! We are located in SJDM, Bulacan.
Cust: Ok po. San po location nyo?
Z: *kasasabi ko lang, Ate. T_T
My mood fluctuates between wanting to laugh or pull my hair off dahil sa mga ganitong klaseng banat ng mga customers ko. But in a way, I'm happy that they're there. They keep my businesses alive. I'm greatful. Kahit ganyan yang mga yan, love ko yan. At pinagdadasal ko na ma bless sila ng products ko. Kahit minsan masakit sila sa ulo, sana talaga dumami pa sila.
24 hours since I signed up from this dating site. Two 20 yo's, a couple of dudes in 30's, about 3 in their 40's and a handful of 50s and 60s marked me as "interested". It's interesting how this works. Someone even marked me as "favorite". I also recieved a few messages na nakakabadtrip lang kasi hindi ko mabuksan dahil kailangan pang mag upgrade sa premium.
Isa dun sa mga nag "interested" saken ay mejo trip ko. He sent me a message. Sheeeet, nakakakileeeg! Hahaha. "Hi" lang naman ang sinabi nya pero feeling ko ready na kong bumuo ng pamilya kasama sya. Lol. Ang futuristic talaga ng mga babae.
I intend to upgrade to premium soon. I can afford naman, kaso I also want to have my money ready in case I recieve bulk orders from my biz and need to shell out money. Ano ba dapat mauna, pera o lovelife? Haha!
Okay, charot lang. I'm not really serious. I'm just enjoying myself. This is actually a good diversion. I still miss someone.
Will it even affect you one bit if I'd end up with someone else? Putek. I hate asking questions like this.
Written by cinderellaareus at 11:28 PM.
Mixed emotions ang araw na to. Parang thriller/horror movie na may nakaka heart attack na SFX.
There was an integrity roadshow this morning. We had a discussion about integrity related rules, sites we're not allowed to visit (which is practically every single website in existence), and so on. They'll do random inspections daw from tims to time. Ang hirap na tuloy mag Facebook in peace. Tas the CEO from America is here for a week too and will randomly visit accounts unannounced. These are making me jumpy everytime the door beeps. Suspense, pare.
Pero ok lang naman. Mas bet ko yung suspense kesa sa drama.
May isang crab na nagmessage sa business ko in fb earlier. Nakakapikon, gusto ko patulan kaso tinatamad ako. Feeling ko hindi rin naman worth it. I just used my seducing prowess to tame her grudge just to be sure she won't cause me problems in the future. Wala rin kasi akong energy talaga to engage in a fight na hindi rin naman magiging profitable saken in the first place.
Then, the boy sent me a message too. Now I'm getting how Gabby and LA felt. This is starting to get exhausting. I'm thinking whether to tell the officers about the convo or not, pero alam ko, pagod na rin sila. This whole issue is getting old. I think we all want to move on na.
Another suspense (but a good one : >.
My favorite world champ is coming to ph for the Discon on 2019. I cant let this pass so I guess I'll be going to Cebu April next year. I hope I won't be needing to sell a few of my stocks para lang rito. 50% excited na ko!!!! Siguro yung other 50% , saka na pag nakabayad na ko. Ang main concern ko talaga e yung problematic kong digestive system. Sana magaganda at maayos sa CR sa Cebu.
Iniisip ko rin.... Well, iniisip ko lang naman... Ang saya siguro if kasama ako sa district contestants sa Discon. Even better kung ako yung mag cha champion. Wala lang, para astig. Pampam kay idol. Haha. Pero srsly, namimiss ko naring manalo.
Now the comedy part.
May guest kami last fri na niloloko naming admirer ni Jay kasi nag message sa kanya telling her na ang galing nya sa public speaking. Tas pinupusuan pa mga posts nya. The following day, the same guest added me in FB, sent me a message, and we had this convo.
I like this kiddo. May taste sya.
Written by cinderellaareus at 08:55 PM.
sabi ni einstein, kung feeling mo daw, nagawa mo na lahat, feeling mo lang yun.
the past weekend was an all time high. activities and duties in business and personal life were clashing, but in the end, naayos naman ang lahat. siguro nga totoong hindi dapat pinoproblema ang problema at siguro mas mainam na minsan hayaan mo ang problema na problemahin ang sarili nya. lol.
ang saya ko lang nung unang beses na may umorder sa shop ko sa Lazada. Feeling ko kasi, 'wow, this is it! mabebenta na na parang hotcakes ang paninda ko'... tapos after non, ayun kahit view, wala. lol.
pag feeling mo nagawa mo na lahat, feeling mo lang yun.
the club's been pretty messed up yesterday. there's some issue that's starting to get out of hand. i wish i can tell the details here.
kung kagabi ko siguro sinulat to, ang dami ko pang nasabi, pero kasi parang humupa na naman yung issue. still, sana maging maayos lahat. malapit na rin kasi mag May. 7th anniversary na namin. kung ako ang masusunod, gusto ko sana na kumpleto kami. pero kasi, inaalala ko rin yung taong affected. ang g*go rin kasi ni..... sighssss! bakit ba ang complicated ng buhay pag may taong involved?
kung saken siguro ginawa yun, things will be a whole lot different. kung may ipinagpapasalamat ako from getting old, siguro yun e on how the years in my age thought me to handle as*holes like a pro.
speaking of getting old. damang dama ko na bes...
bilang holy week, i've been sparing a few minutes sa chap every morning. ang ganda ganda ng vibe sa chap pag holy week. feeling ko nga nandun talaga si God. i love the chap, but i love it so much more pag holy week.
dahil din dito nalaman ko na nasa point na talaga ako ng buhay ko na pag luluhod ako sa pew to complete entire rosary, sumusuko na yung tuhod ko. ang hirap tumayo, teh. wah! old age. huhu.
ang sarap ng tulog ko lately. kahet mejo late narin talaga ko natutulog kakalaro ng cellphone, at least nakakatulog parin ako ng maayos.
all my life, ive been used to the kind of love that gives sleepless night.
may klase rin pala ng love that will keep you sound asleep and well-rested. I like the latter so much better.
"tita, hugas ako kamay," she said.
i took a tabo full of water. cutely, she picked the small piece of soap from the soap holder.
she then cutely rubbed the soap onto her cute little hands.
she motioned to me that she's ready to rinse her hands, so i let her.
i cant understand why those hands so tiny require 3 tabos full of water to rinse. not one, not two, but three!
once finished, she cutely glanced at me asking for a 4th tabo. painfully, i had to say no. she will then cutely walk towards the laundry basket and cutely wipe her cute little hands dry.
she cutely walked away towards the dining table after that.
sighs... i love that girl so much. i wonder if my kaitlyn can ever do anything without being cute.
it just made me wonder... will i ever be a mother too one day?
i wasnt even that keen on getting married until i realized how compatible our values are and the things we like. i remember i liked you because i once saw R in you. i no longer do. still, compatibility didnt work for me back then. i dont know how can it work for me now.
pero siguro, hindi ko naman talaga dapat iniisip tong mga bagay na to sa ngayon.
Written by cinderellaareus at 03:46 PM.
I remember it quite clearly. When I was younger, I thought that the moment you'll realized that you're in love with someone, may makikita kang rainbows, may makikita kang butterflies, complete with mushy details and all.
Years ago, I learned that it's not really like that.
I remember I was boarding a jeepney then when I felt a sudden kick in my gut that told me, "now this is something". I knew then that it was real. Nothing fancy though. Walang rainbows, walang butterflies. Just a silent realization that I was feeling "something".
Sabi nila futuristic daw ang mga babae. Tipong hiningi lang ang number mo, iniisip mo na kagad ang magiging motif ng kasal nyo pati pangalan ng mga magiging anak nyo. Well, I don't deny that.
But then at that time, I was beyond futuristic. Kasi that time, I thought that if this is something real, then it can't just stay here in this life time. That it must surpass my days and his and should probably last for all eternity. Iba rin no? I remember I even wrote a poem out of this. I forgot the 1St line, but the rest went like,
When centuries gone past, will you and I be just a part of history, lost and replaced with a new world?
If so, how can a love so true fade away just like that?
Yeah, mushy. Ikr.
I don't know. It's been years and I never felt that "now, this is something" feeling again.
Maybe because he was the only one who came that close.
I wonder if in the future, someone else will come just as close as that. Or at least close enough to maybe fall in love with me.
Kdrama effect. Ugh, damn this.
Bukod sa time at money, may isa pa pala sa mga resources ng tao ang dapat nyang i-conserve.
Ang kanyang attention span.
Sa ngayon talaga si Son Oh Gong (Lee Seung-gi) lang ang naiisip ko. Nakaka adik yung 'A Korean Odyssey', ayoko nahhhhh! T_T
Written by cinderellaareus at 08:24 AM.
I remember the kdrama, goblin, and wonder if being immortal could mean that you can gather riches at magpayaman since marami kang time. Pero naisip ko na baka hindi rin. Because maybe it's not really about how much time you have but on how you actually spend your time. Ang hirap siguro maging immortal tas broke ka. Buti nalang hindi ako immortal.
Iniisip ko rin na siguro masaya lang maging immortal if may kasama ka na gusto mong kasama for all eternity. Kung ako yung Goblin's bride, gugustuhin ko rin maging immortal kung si gong yoo ang goblin ko. All the more if si Lee seung-gi. Wahhhh! Puso ko!!!! Lel. ><
Pero eto seryoso...
I tried thinking of a person (or persons) I'd be willing to spend eternity with, but I couldn't name one. Parang nakakalungkot tuloy. I wonder how other people would answer this.
Ikaw, do you have anyone in your life you are willing to spend eternity with?
Written by cinderellaareus at 10:32 PM.
pick your reason:
1. I am pregnant
2. I am getting married
3. I am migrating to Antarctica
i hate lying, but then sometimes id want to keep the truth to myself. i wish they will just quit asking.
December had just started and i cant wait for it to be over already. 2 more events and im free.
club's yearend party this friday,
then the following friday, ill be meeting meguri and the kids.
then, maybe finally, i can have some peace.
bff will also be going home in rp later this month with her boyfie. she asked me to go to baguio with them and said she'll bring romel along. her moves scream desperate measure of setting her single friends up. smh.
its been a while since bff and i had a heart to heart talk. i havent updated her much about my life. when she went home in time for my birthday, we mostly talked about her new found love life. whenever she asked about how i had been, i kept my answers short and brought the topic back to her. idk. that girl knows me so well. one wrong word and i know she'd see through me.
dont get me wrong, i trust bff with my life. siguro sometimes, no matter how close we are to the person, there are just things that we'd rather keep to ourselves.
isnt it odd how sometimes, the things that affect us the most, we find so hard to talk about?
Written by cinderellaareus at 10:19 AM.
One by one, their reasons emerged as to why they cannot be there.
As much as I want to be all understanding since I know that we all have lives outside this circle that we are in, I just can't help feeling like I was left all alone on this.
Kailangan ko ba talagang gawin to?
E kung hindi narin kaya ako pumunta?
Naiinis na ko.
Written by cinderellaareus at 06:33 PM.