Entries in category "Sunday"

Sunday: January 14, 2018

Woke up at past 11am today so I'm resigning to the possibility that I might not be sleeping tonight.

Spent the day watching the the 2nd half of "rich man, poor woman" j- drama. I finished off the 1st half yesterday. I think I got this from Nesss 5 years ago. It's been sitting in my laptop that long pero ngayon ko lang napanood. So nice. Kdramas may be a bit better in comparison and their actors and actresses may be a whole lot cuter, pero sa tingin ko, until now, nasa Japan parin ang bias ko.

Ang gwapo ni Oguri Shun. Stalked him a bit to see how he looks like now and nag iba na sya. For one, tatay na rin kasi sya. Hindi na sya kasing sexy ng dati. His eyes are still nice though. Pero yung asawa nya, parang mas gumanda pa over the years. They still look so in love though.

Hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit ang weird ng nararamdaman ako after kong manood ng j-drama. Parang ganito rin yung na feel ko everytime na may matatapos ako na harry potter books. Yung parang masakit na hindi maintindihan. Kahit happy ending, masakit parin. Hindi ko gets. Hindi ko rin makuha yung tamang word kahit sa English or Tagalog. Pero sa Japanese siguro, ang pinaka apt e yung "kurushii".

Kurishii. Hindi ko maintindihan bakit ang sakit. Lol. Ayoko ng ganitong feeling. Sa Kdrama parang hindi ganito. And promise, sobrang feel-good drama lang ng rmpm.

Ayoko sana manood ng Korean or J-drama. Mas lalo kasing mahirap ma appreciate ang reality pag nakakita ka ng world na so much better than the real one. But what can I do? That's the only way I can have my peace...

14th day of the year and I still don't feel like talking to, hearing or seeing other people. I don't know what's wrong with me.

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Written by cinderellaareus at 11:13 PM.

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Coco, Gong Yoo, etc.
Sunday: December 17, 2017

I'm trying to read. it's been a while since the last time I've been home on a weekend like this. I'm just a simple soul. I remember my definition of a perfect day was sitting on a couch or on a bed with a good book on my lap and my dog next to me. since my dog left me a year ago, I can't have that perfect day anymore. but then maybe I can invent another definition of a perfect day, right?

yesterday, brother thought of bringing kaitlyn to the cinema and have her watch a movie for the first time in big screen. The movie of choice was Coco, but when I showed her the trailer of the movie, she wasn't so thrilled. We didn't know Coco has skeletons among the characters so I ended up watching the movie by myself.

I love watching movies alone. The darkness offers freedom; to be yourself, to do as you please; without having to worry on how you would look like or if you're causing trouble to other people. Whenever I watch movies, I often pick the topmost seat at the premier section nearest the aisle. That's where the best view is kasi. But I remember whenever I watch movie with Gabby and the gang, he would always pick seats nearer the screen, in the economy section even. When I asked him why, he said something like, "para hindi tayo nadidistorbo pag may dumadaan." So yesterday, I gave it a try. I sat at a seat at the economy section, near the aisle and farthest from the screen. True enough there were very few people sat there. Very few distractions and it was very peaceful that it more the compensated the so-so view. I guess I'd consider watching at the economy section more often.

I loved Coco. I realized that maybe the reason why someone liked it too was because he kind of looks like the boy in that movie. Lel.
Masaya sana if Kaitlyn will get to watch thid movie rin. If only she is not so scared of mumu, she'll probably like this too. Maybe when she gets older. Hopefully.
Weekend last week, ang daming ganap. Much like the other weekends before that. I was multitasking so I can barely focus on anything else, that's why when his message came, I got to see only the last too lines and i then hit the like button. It was only 3 days later that I noticed the previous messages. Puteeek, ang lamig ng sagot ko.

The boy turned 31 just recently. Unlike the previous years, he now looks happy. In a way, ok na rin even if his happiness has nothing to do with me. I wish that he'll be taken care of, that boy can be a little too sensitive at times kasi.

I still remember things. I remember, he used to text every time he had a haircut only to ask if I liked it or not. Ang mean pa ng mga sagot ko non. I never told him how I've always liked his hair.

Over the years, I think I was able to develop my maturity. Maybe I've gained wisdom too. Funny just when I feel like I am now finally capable of taking care of someone else, that "someone else" that I wish to take care of is already beyond my reach. 

Ok lang naman.
Currently watching the kdrama, Goblin. I've tried to avoid Kdrama because I've seen some of my friends got eaten alive by this monster. I've been watching the series for a market research, pero putek, ang hirap palang hindi makain ng sistema ng kdrama. Ang hirap hindi mahalin si Gong Yoo!!!! To make up for my sucky love life, Universe, pwede bang saken nalang si Gong Yoo? Hahahaha!
Few episodes left. After this, awat na muna sa kdrama, Z.

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Written by cinderellaareus at 11:39 AM.

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Random thoughts
Sunday: December 10, 2017

1. I saw people who changed their preferences in their adulthood and dreaded what if this will happen to me too? Not that I have issues with people like this.  I just don't want to have a life that complicated. Pero right now, puteeeek, sa landi kong to, I don't think so. 

2. I arrived not paying much attention since I was feeling sick. He flashed his signature smile and motioned me to sit beside him. Then, picture time. I couldn't fit in the frame so he grabbed me by the waist, pulling me closer to him.

Oh boy, careful on that side...

3. Yearend party over yet peace is still out of sight. Maybe in a few days. 

4. Saw that Fr. Mario is back in RP. He'll probably go back to Italy again so I've got to make the most of his days–hopefully weeks–here. I'll be reserving all my Wednesday for this. Sana nandun sya. 

5. Sa tingin ko nagegets ko na kung ano ang problema ko and why I was crying. When I was younger,  naisip ko na langing may paraan. Na pag may bagay kang gusto at kung pagsusumikapan mo talaga, makukuha mo. On rare occasions na hindi mo madaan sa effort, meron ka paring isa pang alas; ask the Heavens. Di ba wala namang imposible sa langit? As I grew older, na realize ko na hindi ata ganun. I still believe na walang imposible sa Langit. But when you're an adult,  things can be a whole lot complicated. At may mga bagay pala na kahit gusto mo, hindi mo susubukang kunin. At kahit alam mong pwede namang ibigay ng Langit, hindi mo parin hihingin. 

6. I'm missing some of my friends na bihira ko nang makita. Neri is one of my favorite friends in this lifetime. Was chatting with her about our all-time favorite topic: boys. I was sending her a picture of some boy that I thought she might find interesting. Nasa bus ako non and I was halfway through writing the caption when, so sobrang likot ng bus, I accidentally sent it to our club officer's group chat. It was a lupa-lamunin-mo-ko moment. Worst part, kilala nila yung boy. 

7. I checked my weight at a mall yesterday and found that I'm 10 kilos heavier than I was 4 years ago.



8. Siguro, sa ideal world, makakagawa ako ng 3 speeches in 4 weeks to complete my CC and level 1 before March ends. Nasan ba yang ideal world na yan? 

9. Tinatamad akong mag BSP10 ulet. 

10. Ok,  wala na ko maisip. 

11. Ja~

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Written by cinderellaareus at 07:40 PM.

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Sunday: November 5, 2017

So someone sent me a message telling how he gave my number to his friend who's in need of a speaker for their public speaking event in some University. Sabi kasi "do something that scares you." So I was like, Sure! Go! No worries. That's exciting! Blah blah blah. Pero puteeeek, nag sa summersault na yung puso ko, Bes.

Then I got the message from the "friend" and learned that the event is this Tuesday na. Tuesday!!!

Sabi ng logic, "tae ka, wala ka ng oras mag prepare. Anong petsa na?!"

Sabi ng reason, "May pasok ka. Paano?"

Sabi ng internal organs ko, "Ayoko! Kinakabahan ako! Wahhhhh!"


And yet, I replied, "Sure! Please send me the details. *insert smileys*"



Why am I doing this to myself?

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Written by cinderellaareus at 04:31 PM.

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Good Morning, Tabby!
Sunday: September 3, 2017

7:41am. I just woke up and I can smell our breakfast so I will try to make this quick.

Division contest yesterday. Gabby won, crush came second. Mejo na surprised lang ako sa result because there was this other candidate that got me mesmerized yet he wasn't able to place any. Not complaining though.

Ang galing ni Gabby. I don't have the slightest doubt that our club will be having our first district champion on midcon. I've watched him since day 1 and he seemed to have gotten even better. I wonder if I will ever get to that level. I wonder how can I get to that level. I also want to be a district champion myself and then after that, world champion.

Jer and I were talking about this while on the way to ADB. He also dreams to become a world champion. He told me he accepts that he can't be the world champion just now. That he needs to grow his skill set first and he's expecting to get it maybe in 5 years. I told him, the Universe bends in our expectations (because I want, and believe I can get it, now). I wonder if I'm just being delusional. 


A girl-friend took me by the arm and brought me out of everyone's earshot to ask:

"Si *insert the boy's name here*... may pag-asa ba sya? I saw you, guys, and you look cute together."

Shoot, how do you answer questions like this? 


Went home with Gabby after our lunch celebration. It felt weird because I think this was the first time that we went home together na maliwanag pa. Pero ok lang. Gala means gastos and I would do some budget tightening right now.

Sabi sa nabasa ko, those who always live below their means lack imagination. Sighs...

While on the way home, the topic about me being the next pres was brought up. I told Gabby my reasons on how I cannot be the next President, all of which were money related.

I love my club, you know that. If only I have something to give I more than gladly would. I realized though, that maybe, instead of finding reasons why I can't, maybe I should start finding ways on how I can. I said it myself: the Universe bends on our expectations. I want to use this as an inspiration to work on my goals for 2018. Oh Lord, help me.

Sabi nga ni Gabby, dapat positive!


We were in the car, Bea, Jay, LA and I. It was the first time that Jay joined us on a girl talk like this. I've heard many of her stories before, but this was the first time that she talked of the other loves she had. See, I love Jay like a sister and I've always looked up on her character and her brilliance. But that afternoon, in Bea's car, she gained my respect.

In love stories, we have that assurance that things will be ok in the end. Pero sa real life pala, hindi laging ganon.

Bea, Jay and LA: these girls are wonderful people. I wish them love. I wish them happiness. And if it will make their lives better, I wish they will find someone who will truly care for them.


I looked at them, I found peace. Maybe maturity is when you wish someone happiness even if it's with someone else. Or maybe it's love. I'm not so sure.


When asked what he likes about me, he said "simply beautiful".

When asked, "maganda ba si zah?" he nodded.

Bea told him, "kung gusto mo sya, dapat sabihin mo sa kanya."


I've been trying to calm the boy down and these people aren't really helping.

Pero ok lang. Masaya naman. I will just find a way to smooth things out pag totoong may problema na. He's someone I don't want to hurt... But then, maybe I don't have to...

Wait.... what?!

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Written by cinderellaareus at 08:27 AM.

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Time is gold. The plated type.
Sunday: August 20, 2017

One month + advanced birthday gift from the parentals.

A shining, shimmering, splendid automatic wristwatch, price of which amounts to the wristwatches i owned in my entire lifetime.

For someone who lived with divisoria bought wristwatch (about 50- 75 php apiece) most of her life...

I cant wipe the smile off my face. Lel.

* * * * * * * * *

Written by cinderellaareus at 03:48 PM.

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Catch and juice
Sunday: August 6, 2017

A lot of things shocked me today. Some rather juicy stuff. 

I was raised in a somewhat conservative environment. Siguro, kung hindi ako nakakilala ng mga taong may not-so-commonly-accepted circumstances, siguro magiging quick to judge and hard to understand din ako.

Different folks, different strokes. Minsan hindi ata tayo ang nasa posisyong sumagot sa tanong na 'tama ba to?' Or 'patas ba to?' Kundi ung taong pumiling ilagay ang sarili nila sa sitwasyon kung san nandun sila. Nakadadag pa yung realization na "wait, that could've been me."

Some people would resort to call out those who do what seems to be wrong. Iniisip ko kung yun nga ba yung tamang gawin.

I think, the Heavens called us to LOVE. Hindi to CORRECT. Hindi ba trabaho na ng Langit ang magcorrect? 

Sabi ni Bob Ong, pipihit pihitin daw ng tao ang katotohanan hanggang sa maging komportable ito sa makasarili nyang puso. Iniisip ko kung ito ba ung ginagawa ko ngayon.

I observed the other side of the spectrum. Those who chose to conform to the things that are accepted as universally correct. Parang hindi naman masaya. Iniisip ko kung basehan ba ung pagiging masaya ng pagiging tama.

Hindi ko alam.

What if i choose the other side. The side who refuse to conform to the socially accepted truth. I wonder how bad i can go.


Today, natutunan kong may 5 na uri ng tao.

Those who refuse to catch.

Those who lack the skills to.

Those who catch and release.

Those who catch and collect.

Those who catch and keep.

Can u identify which type are u?

I'm not so sure myself, but I'm pretty sure on what I'd like to become.

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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:31 PM.


The glass and the hand
Sunday: August 6, 2017

So it seemed like the glass found it's way into my hands.

I swear, i didn't to anything.

I do not trust my hands in holding something so delicate, so i handed the glass to someone else's.


When my niece was still so small, i rarely carried her. Not because i didnt want to. I just wanted to make sure she won't get crushed in my arms. So i handed her to the arms more able than mine.

Pero hindi ibig sabihin, hindi sya mahalaga....


Will this crush me?


We are yet to find out.

* * * * * * * * *

Written by cinderellaareus at 09:26 AM.

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How are you?
Sunday: July 16, 2017

-Itchy eyes

-Runny nose

-Sneezing fit

These are the ingredients of my sunday evening. 3 days into my bakasyon grande and im still at the "decluttering" stage and yet to reach the "planning" stage. Kinailangan ko kasing magpalayas kaya hindi din ako matapos tapos.


Soap and dust.

Two things I'm allergic with. Sabi ng doctor before wala naman talagang cure sa allergy, you can only drink meds for relief or totally avoid the cause. I know it's impossible to avoid these two and I've long resigned to the fact i have to go on a sneezing fiesta in every day of my life. Pero recently, dumadagdag pa yung itchy eyes sa side effect. Hindi ko kaya, bes.. Huhu.


Kapapanood ko lang ng bagong ad ng jollibee sa facebook. Hindi ko nagustuhan. Eexplain ko sana reason ko pero, nakakatamad kasi. Basta.

Out of the arena for days now. Or weeks na ata. I lost counting. It is during times like this na wala akong target na naaalala kita. Tas napanood ko pa ad ng jollibee. Well, iba naman story naten pero.... Wait, ano ngang story naten?

Alam mo ba, hinihintay ko ang time na magse-settle down ka na. Gusto ko kasing malaman kung anong magiging reaction ko dun, because right now, i can only speculate.

Kamustaka ka na ba, R?

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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:20 PM.


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"A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep"

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my name is z




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