Entries in category "日曜日"



Ki ni natteru
日曜日: May 15, 2022



He was waving goodbye while leaning forward. Ang cute nya! Para syang anime! Bet na bet ko talaga this kiddo.

I should've waited a bit at the elevator. I really enjoy our mini conversations, I want to get to know more about him.

Said we're transferring building. Someone said, baka di daw kasama ang PDT. I hope that's not true.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:24 PM.

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This Is It
日曜日: May 8, 2022



Nakasabay ko pauwi yung cute kiddo from pdt. Technically, hanggang sa exit ng building lang. Same pala kami ng sched. Learned that he's also voting for Leni. 

Moment of truth na tomorrow. Feeling ko hindi sya mananalo. Sana mali ako. Good luck talaga sa Pilipinas.

Sighs. Bahala ka na, Universe.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:04 PM.

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Futsuu no ichi nichi
日曜日: April 24, 2022



Mom and Bro left early morning yesterday to go to Cavite for my Nephew's birthday party. Neice, Nephew, and their mother went there a few days earlier. It had been just Dad and I since. Incidentally, Mom lost a brother yesterday. She must be mourning, but it's not like she'll skip her grandchild's party for this.

Adulthood is scary. Life has so many demands, you can't even mourn. Of course, I'm not sad about losing an uncle so I wouldn't understand so much. He lived in Davao, and we were not really close,  so yeah.

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Going back to the office in a week. Sabi ko dati I'll make use of the time I have while working from home to make a lot of money, so I'll be rich enough to not work anymore, by the end of the Pandemic. Anyare, teh?

Sighs.

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Been trying to remember a certain poem I've made. 

See, I love poems. I've memorized all of my favorite poems, and the oldest one I learned in grade 2.

"There is no frigate like a book/ To take us land away/ Or any cruisers like a page/Of fancy poetry"

Or that poem that bff made for her crush in high school:

"I know I was to blame/ If you don't know my name/ If I can theft your heart/ mine will not be inept."

Or the one I read from an old book from our university library:

"For a moment I thought I could forget you/ for a moment I thought I could still the restlessness in my heart/ I thought the past could no longer haunt me/ nor hurt me/ how wrong I was...."

Those were nice poems. I've wrote countless poems myself. The 1st poem I wrote, I've written when I was six. That was basically the time when I just started learning to write sentences.

It's just weird, I didn't memorize any of the poems I've made. There's this one poem I want to remember. It was about R. It was about the time when we were at the pool, and he was carrying me on his back... gah! I can only remember the last line...

"He's no longer there..."

F*ck. It felt important. I really want to remember. But I've burned all my letters and notes years ago... I don't think I've written it anywhere on the internet.

Well, come to think of it... between that guy and I, parang laging nagko conspire talaga ang langit against us. Not that it matters now. It's not that I'm gonna do anything. I just really want to remember. Damn it.

Sighs... it's getting really lonely lately. Maybe I've been reading too much BL.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 06:13 PM.

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Sentakushi
日曜日: March 27, 2022



Every time I eat something sweet, I feel like I'm shortening my life span.

Drinking coke now with chocolate syrup. I hate the taste of regular coke, I can't really stand it, but Ted said that artificial sugar in sugar-free drinks can cause cancer. I guess this is a better choice. I just finished my coke zero float though. This is just a refill as we do not have coke zero at home.

I'm not forgetting that I am sick. 

When I was younger, I thought that 30 years was a long enough number of years to live. I still think the same at 36. Parang yung sabi sa isang kanta, "I've had just enough time."

If you're not scared of dying, then what's really there left to be afraid of?

My late friend, Cristina, predicted that she was not going to live past 30. She died few months before she reached that age. She also made a prediction about me. She said that when that prediction came true, I would remember her. I remember the prediction to date. It still hasn't come true yet.

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I've finished the last ep available for Attack on Titan. I think the next ep will be released on April 4. Final ep na ata. I'm not sure. Started watching the spin-off series. 

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Having bout of sadness for days now. Feelings like this usually go away when ignored. I've just been thinking of what to do with my life. I remember wanting to do great things when I was younger. Then at some point, great things stopped to matter.

Naalala ko yung scene sa Tangled na conflicted si Rapunzel kung anong gagawin yan pag natupad na yung pangarap nya. Tas sabi ni Flynn Rider, something like, "then, just find a new dream."

Ang simple nung sagot sa parehas na tanong na tinatanong ko sa sarili ko for the longest of time, back then. I happened to reached my life-long dream when I was 23, and from then on, I felt like I was just going with the flow, floating through life aimlessly.

Pero naalala ko, I have another life-long dream that I've set aside for the longest of time now. Ang hirap nya kasing makuha. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko ba makukuha. At hindi ko rin alam kung makakabuti ba sakin kung makukuha ko sya.

Now I'm once again conflicted. Should I get off my ass and work towards this dream that may even turn out to be something I don't really like? Or should I just continue having the comfort of floating aimlessly through life?

The fact that I have these options is a blessing in itself. I think we need to quit the unnecessary drama. I just feel like, I don't have an infinite amount of time, so making the correct choice is crucial.

But what makes a correct choice though?

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Gah, this drink is killing me faster than heat stroke. Sobrang init sa Pilipinas, I'm resorting to ingesting drinks that are bad for me.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 01:46 PM.

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Tada tabemono no hanashi
日曜日: February 27, 2022



Noong unang panahon, may isang lalaking nagsabi sakin na type nya daw ang mga babaeng foodie. Lol.

I've always had this love-hate relationship with food. And I don't really cook. That's just how it is.

I successfully avoided sugar the entire January. Came February, and I started having cheat dayssss every week. Cheat days run 3 to 4 days. Lol. Who am I kidding?

I'm not gaining weight, but I'm losing some at a really slow pace. Like only about 1 kilos every 2 weeks.

The reason why I've been avoiding sugar is to somehow extend my lifespan due to this nodule on my thyroid at tirads 4.

Lately, I've somehow lost interest in extending my lifespan, but I've been bothered with the issue going on in Ukraine and Russia. If Ph will somehow get caught in all this chaos, I would like to get at least fit enough to run for my life—while carrying 7 cats and 2 senior citizens(my parents), that is.

Ang gulo ng mundo, no? Kawawa yung mga bata, mga hayop, at mga matatanda. Ano kaya ang gagawin ko pag nagkaron ng gyera? I will do everything in my power to protect those that matters to me. I just wish I'd be strong enough to do the job. Bakit ba walang superheroes sa henerasyon na ito?

I love bread. I wonder if I'll die early if I keep on eating bread. I stopped eating meat in consideration to the animals around 3 years ago. Can I at least keep on eating bread? Really...

I was raised to believe that I was an exceptional kid. The results of the things that I do usually fluctuates from really bad to really good though. But at times like this, I sometimes imagine myself teaming up with the brilliant minds all over the world to solve the world's problem. Nakakatawa, I actually do not have a single doubt that I can do it.

I must be watching too much anime.

But really, what can I do?



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Written by cinderellaareus at 04:19 PM.

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Cloudy
日曜日: February 6, 2022



Slept past 10 last night thinking of an oval melts-in-the-mouth cake, wondering if I should once again have a cheat day next week.

Been having phlegm build-up on lungs on and off since last year when we got sick. Last month, I had this mucus build-up on the lungs for the entire month. I had been trying to get a hold of N Acetyl Cystein supplement to get it fixed. The one I bought in Shopee gave me stomachache for 3 days. I wonder if it was fake or maybe Swanson was just not a good supplement brand. I remember having the same problem when I bought lysine from the same store.

Healthy Option's online shop does not have NAC. Last Thursday, dumayo pa ko ang SM North para magbakasakali na merong NAC ang physical shop. Sulit naman ang total of 4 hours commute, dahil on the 2nd day, the phlegm build-up was totally gone. Wala ring stomachache at all.

Pre-pandemic era, noong pumapasok pa ko sa office, some guy I do not know offered me an oval-shaped pastry na parang cheese cake. Since hindi naman sya mukhang axe murderer, at napansin ko din na mukhang sosyal yung box ng cake at mukhang Japanese brand, tinanggap ko na.

The cake's label read "Kumori", a Japanese word that means "cloudy". One bite and it melts in the mouth. Sobrang sarap. Sabi ng kasama ko sa trabaho, meron daw kumori sa Gateway. Hindi ko na nga lang nagawang hanapin.

Last Thursday, habang nagkanda ligaw ligaw ako kakahanap ng exit malapit sa sakayan pauwi, nakasalubong ko yung kumori. Box of 6 was worth 300. Halos dalawang kagat lang yung laki per piece, sa price na 50 pesos. Grabe. Pero, well, sulit naman.

Naiisip isip ko yung cake ng kumori kagabi. Ano kayang lasa nung ube flavor? Cheese palang ang natitikman ko. May mga iba pa silang pastry dun na mukha ring masarap.

Yung supposed cheat day ko e inabot ng 4 days. I did not gain weight, but lost only half kilo. I usually lose 2 kilos per week. I'm striving to lower my blood sugar to below 90 by drinking dissolved cocoa powder without sugar every meal. If I can maintain this blood sugar level and steady weight-loss, how much damage will I get if I'll eat a cake from kumori again next week?

Kaso... kailangan ko ring mag tipid.

My neice found the kumori box and was asking what was in it. I explained how it looked and tasted like in full details, which made my neice say, "gusto ko rin nun, Tita". I love my neice.

There are 7 of us in the house. 1 pc each will not suffice. 3 boxes cost 900 pesos. Wala pa yung pamasahe at pagkain ko. 

Gusto ko ng kumori cake.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:59 AM.

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Ida
日曜日: January 16, 2022



And this is how Ida-kun looks like in manga. Goodness.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 04:38 PM.

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Three
日曜日: December 12, 2021



Nung Friday, nilagay ko sa box yung mga damit ko for 3 days na papasok ako sa office. Isinama ko na rin yung pantulog ko na isusuot pag-uwi ko sa bahay. I just want these 3 days to get over with.

Yung automatic wristwatch na regalo sakin ng mama ko years ago, masikip na. Sinubukan ko iiextend yung bracelet, ayun, nasira. I'm pretty sure the shop can easily fix this. This has a lifetime warranty. Problema lang, wala akong maisusuot tomorrow. Yung iba kong relo, wala ng battery.

Keriboom boom.

Nakakatamad. For the nth time, tinanong ko kung anong floor nga ang workstation namin. Sana pwede mag sakit sakitan at mag stay nalang sa bahay.

Reresbak kami sa Thursday sa mall na hindi kami pinayagang mag dine-in dahil hindi pa kompleto ang bakuna namin. Now that we're fully vaccinated, siguro naman pwede na.

Miss ko na mag buffet and smoke-less grill. I've been browsing posts from the same resto para may idea ako kung anong kakainin ko. Nag research din ako kung pano makarami ng kain sa buffet. Sobrang bilis ko kasing mabusog. Isa sa mga tips dun e mag exercise daw. Kaya araw araw araw akong nag eexercise para marami akong makakain sa buffet. Lol.

3 days. Sana maging okay lahat. 

-‐-----

There are just the 3 of us—Mom, Dad, and I—dito sa bahay. My brother and his family are in Cavite. They'll be spending Christmas there, so sa pasko, tatlo lang rin kami. 

I plan to buy cakes tas big scoop na ice cream, kung meron sa mall malapit dito. Kung wala, I'll buy an ice cream from avocadoria. I've long been wanting to taste that. Gusto rin namin mag grill. Maybe the traditional way, or kung makakahanap kami ng electric grill na pang samgyeup, siguro yun na.

May pasok ako ng 25th, pero keri naman siguro magpuyat. Sana maging masaya.

Been checking this year's photos from my phone. A really good way to check the activities I had this year.

Walang remarkable. Walang kagila gilalas na bagay akong na achieve. 

Alam ko, being alive at this point, and still having a complete family with all of us alive and healthy, e malaking blessings na. Pero kahit ganun, I still feel... disappointed ba? Sad? Discontent?

Siguro all of the above.

I haven't met my friends even once this year. Tamad na tamad rin kasi akong bumyahe. Feeling ko, buong taon ko, umikot sa pag-aalaga ng pusa.

I really love my cats though.

Still, siguro kung may feeling of dissatisfaction ka about your life, e dapat gumawa ka ng paraan to make some changes. 

Hindi ko alam kung anong changes ba ang gusto ko. Sa bawat change kasi, laging meron kang comfort na kailangang i-sacrifice. And boy, this girl loves comfort.

Feeling ko, ang isa sa mga taon na pinakamaswerte ako e 2019. Ang daming naging blessings ko that year at andami ring memories na nacreate.

Kung tutuusin, I've never been less blessed in the years that follow. Siguro sadyang nakalimutan ko lang kung panong maging grateful kaya hindi na ganun ka blessed ang feeling.

On 2022, gusto kong maging mas masaya. And as a side effect, gusto ko maging mas mayaman pa.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 04:09 PM.

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日曜日: October 10, 2021



Ang pogi ni Abarai Renji ng Bleach, no? I stopped watching when I got sick. 2 nights back ko nalang ulet naalala. Mejo nakalimutan ko na tuloy ang kwento.

Inuubo pa rin ako. Lalo atang lumalala nung kumain ako ng cake, cassava cake, at pichi pichi about 4 days back. My cough was particularly nasty yesterday, so I resorted to some desperate measure.

500 ml water, plus 15 drops of 3% hydrogen peroxide, then a tiny pinch of borax--- made 2 bottles of this same mixture and drank throughout the day (total of 1 liter). The cough did improve quickly, but as much as possible, I don't want to consume this concoction kasi pag nagkamali at na deds ako, baka ma headline pa ko ng "babae, uminom ng borax, patay". Jahe di ba.

Flouride is actually a more lethal poison than cynide, pero di tayo nadededs kahit kainin natin yung toothpaste because of the very small amount. Same goes with borax. 

May konting ubo pa ko. But not as bad as yesterday. Tokwa, isang buwan na kong inuubo.

Gutom na ko. But I'm scared of eating the different junk foods on my drawer, dahil baka lalo akong ubuhin. Dahil dito, I still weigh 2 kilos less than how I did before I got sick. Not a bad exchange. Pero gusto ko paring gumaling.

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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:34 AM.

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C I N D E R E L L A A R E U S
"A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep"

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私の名前はZです。

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