Entries for January, 2014
got this cool game from nnaeiluj :
Let's get to know each other better. :D
The deal is... you ask me 3 questions and then you get to do the same on your blog, that is, post this entry as a stickied post, so others can ask you 3 questions, too.
Game on! :D
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let's do this!!
03:07 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
hey. i feel like its been a while. how are you?
my recent days had been filled with highs and lows. daig ko pa ang bipolar kung mag change mood. but at the moment, i guess, im feeling neutral.
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i signed an assessment paper for my regularization kanina. 6 months na pala ko sa work ko on the 29th. ang bilis bilis ng mga araw. hindi ko manlang namalayan. next month, 1 year na matapos kong umalis sa 1st co ko.
feeling ko ang dami daming nangyari pero wala paring nangyari sa buhay ko. siguro meron naman. pero ano na? now what? wala man lang akong back up plan. ang mas masama pa, wala akong plan at all.
ang totoo nyan, dahil settling type naman talaga ako, i really would love to stop hopping around. ok naman kasi dito. wala nga lang masyadong ginagawa. tipong manghihinayang ka sa brain cells mo. sa 5 years mo sa kolehiyo. sa pagsusunog mo ng kilay maipasa lang ang mechanics. dito kasi kahit ipagmayabang ko pang mataas ang grades ko sa algebra, triginometry, differential, integral, at engineering calculus, advanced math, engineering mechanics, statistics, strength of materials at theory of structures e walang epekto. walang bearing. wapakels, walang makikinig. ano nga namang kinalaman ng lahat ng to sa speech recognition at pdf softwares?...syempre wala.
gusto ko pa bang maging engineer ulet? or lilipat lang ulet ako sa ibang jap language related job? pero kung gagawin ko yun, bat pa ko aalis? kung mag eengineer naman ako, kung gusto ko ng sahod na gaya ng sahod ko now, kaylangan ko pang mag abroad. ayoko mag abroad. or at least ayoko magtrabaho dun. my family's here. my dogs are here. most of my friends are here. plus, yung panata wednesday ko.. yung feast.. si fr. M, bro bo..yung R A V E.. gusto ko dito.. haayy..ayoko na magisip.
bahala na. i still have six months more. i promised the qm a 1 year stay and i want to keep my word. my credibility matters to me. so, six months. i need to think, plan and act. sighs.. ano bang mangyayaring masama kung mag iistay nlng ako? hindi ko rin alam. bahala na. stay or leave, mag iisip ako. hayyys.
the TL told me kanina na if i intend to leave dapat ako na rin daw humanap ng papalit sa sarili ko. siguro n foresee nila to kasi ganito yung trend. i really feel sorry for them on this part. but, well, maybe i can help. we will see. 6 months..
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the world offers a vast possibilities.. nakakatuwa dahil kahet madalas e idle lng ako, nararamdaman ko parin yung flame. yung hunger for greatness. yung hope na in time, makukuha ko rin yun. greatness..
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lovelife update:
J greeted me on skype this morning calling me "honey bunch". i just asked him a favor yesterday and he im'd me to report about it. its always easy to ask favors from J , and with his "tabi tayo" jokes, "dahil sayo" jokes and now the most recent "honey bunch" joke, i wonder if his jokes are somewhat half meant. hmmm.. but i guess, i lived long enough to know na hindi porket mabait sayo e may gusto na sayo. tama, si J yun e, tapos ako to. kaya hindi naman siguro.. plus, i know J. hindi sya torpe type. kung may gusto sya, magsasalita sya. kaya malamang, hindi nga. so, erase.
-----erase-----
yesterday, opis crush wanted me to watch some vid na may daga sa simula or something, tipong makapang asar lang.
"panoorin mo yung video, send ko sayo yung link. may facebook ka ba?" --opis crush
"e kung iadd mo kaya muna ko sa facebook?"-- me. pero syempre, nasa isip ko lang sinabi tong sagot ko.
mabait si opis crush at madali lang naman iclick yung "add as friend" button, hindi ko lang alam kung baket hindi ko ginagawa. tipong wait till you rot ang drama.
hay. tama na nga ang kalokohang ito. hindi ko alam kung kelan naimbento ng hypothalamus ko ang "one crush only" policy na to. after college siguro. hindi ko na matandaan.
pauso.
feeling ko hindi ako makapag palit ng crush at will lately. taeness. whatever.
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this year, i am aiming for a balanced life. career, self, spiritual, financial, social life, family tapos lovelife. yung ibang part naman tingin ko kaya pang i balance, pero yung lovelife kasi taeness. parang paikot ikot lang. parang taling buhol buhol. dapat siguro subukan ko rin tingnan yung interesado naman saken. so, si parrot? or yung stalker??waahhh!!! ayawan nalang!!
<chusi ka pa te?>
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itutulog ko nalang ang mga kalokohang ito.
10:07pm. goodnight.
10:14 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
i basically ruined all the schedule i have set for this long weekend to be productive. didnt go to the feast.didnt update R A V E's blog. i just practically stayed home playing candy crush, watching tagalized film, staring at the ceiling, hugging my bended legs in front of my stomach, rocking myself while murmuring "crispin..basilyo.. mga anak ko" kind of thing. grabe, nakakaaning.
for the last 2 days, i just ate and ate and did nothing else. i shouldve read books, or made some business plan or whatever. sighs. this is not good
injan wants us to go to baguio by march,
bff wants to go to coron by may,
my budget told me that i should just stay home and bite my nails.--
maybe i should find an extra job soon. its hard to stick to spending 70% of your earnings considering that its not even 70% since im still giving 2/3 of my income to my parents. 70% of what's left is a very tiny amount. im not complaining, though.. i just feel like if i really intend to nurture my relationships this year, i need more money. because, come on, if im going to meet my friends, its not like we're just gonna talk. we need to eat too. go somewhere, spend money. sighs.. i need to increase my earnings..
im gonna be back to work tom. i wonder how much weight i gained. i havent even fully recovered from my acquired holiday fats..i feel like im losing track. but im not gonna let things go on like this.
success requires change. and change is always a painful process. but really, right now, making it there is my only option since ive already thrown away my comfortable life. i had no way of claiming it back. i did it for this purpose afterall.
dapat tigilan ko na ang kalalaro ng candy crush..
=(
02:32 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
i think there's something wrong with my writings lately...so, im gonna make my entries exclusive for now.
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how are things going.
ive been really fine lately.
the new jguy at work came. he's super nice and friendly. he's half japanese half korean and sort of rich kid type. bff asked me for his name before he came here. she stalked him for "my sake" daw, saying, "inaalam ko lang ang magiging future mo".. the guy doesnt look bad. he in fact look a little like ex-almost-boyfriend which i find a little disturbing, pero sa ngayon, wala naman akong nafefeel na spark whatsoever(spark daw?). sa ngayon ha..hehe.. chusi pa te?
anyway, i was having a red alert today, plus my acid attact is in full bloom. just a few sip of coke zero made me suffer for the last few days and counting. taenes. what's worse, the meds dont seem to work n. sigh.
tas kanina, i asked opis crush work related questions. he was being his mapang asar self then, when he was rocking my chair just to annoy me. eh, red alert nga ko, so i told him to stop. and when he didnt listen, i sort of brush his hands off my seat sana. pero lightly lang..hehe..wala lang..parang..indirect holding hands??haha..harots.. his hand are soft. tas kahet maginaw sa office, warm yung hands nya. i have a thing for guys with soft hands, really.
hayys.. opis crush... (highschool?)
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got to cut this here. its 10:03. i need to sleep.
jaa
10:11 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
