Entries in category "金曜日"



Many Men
金曜日: September 16, 2020



Wednesday and I'm free again.

I remember reading somewhere that we should love in such a way that the person we love feels free.

There're just so many things running in my head now.

This week, I realized na marami pang lalaking good catch na single pa rin at hindi bading. 

Tinatamad lang naman talaga akong mag reply. Minsan kasi mas gusto ko nalang manood ng koreanovela.

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Just got a message for an officemate that another one from JP team has resigned. Hindi nya rin alam kung bakit.

Morning shift had been so hayahay lately. 2-3 calls, max na yung 7. Tas mga backlogs, minsan wala pang 10. Hindi ko maintindihan bakit hindi na kami binibigyan ng backlogs ni Divya.

I am in no way missing the times when I'm working on over 40 tickets per day. Nakakapraning lang kasi pag biglang ganito. Tas malalaman ko nalang na biglang nag resign si Kenta? Tokwa, bakit? 

Sighs.

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I don't know what's with this feeling. Yung... ano ba tawag dito? Yung feeling na parang walang saysay lahat,  ganun? Ewan ko. Kung tutuusin, ok naman ang lahat. My family is happy and complete. We sleep in warm bed. We have lovely dogs and a cat. And I have a job that pays me well...

Tapos?

Hindi ko masasabing love life ang kulang. Not at this time. I feel like it's all within my grasps, as if offering a hand for a handshake and I'm just standing there staring.

Ano ba tong hallow part na hindi kayang punan kahit ng love life? 

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When I signed in for work this morning, a call immediately came. When the man on the other line spoke, I understood the language but somehow got lost on how to respond. I fumbled for the Japanese words to use, yet nothing felt applicable until I realized, "takte, Korean."

Been watching a lot of kdrama. I never really stopped since we subscribed in Netflix. I'm seriously thinking of studying korean. Someone from the Korean team at work gave me a link where he self-studied Korean Language. Took him 1 year lang daw, and now nag ko Korean support na sya. Gusto ko rin matutong mag Korean.

Minsan feeling ko kaya I lack interest in meeting real-life decent men e dahil di sila katulad ng mga bida sa Kdrama. Bad trep. 

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May friend, LA, is crushing on this Japanese dude she met on an online TM meeting for a TM club in Japan. Infey, gwapo yung dude. There'll be having a meeting again this week, pero Saturday kasi at tatapat sa shift ko. I'd really want to join. Nakakatuwa kasi yung guy. I've checked his profile tas based on his picture e parang yung mga trip nya sa buhay e same ng mga trip ko sa buhay. Laman din kasi sya ng learning events. Tas Japanese pa sya. Wala lang. Interesting lang.

Yung crush ko sa TM from another club, ok rin naman e. Single din yun. And he's Chinese. Parehas din kami ng mga trip sa buhay. Alam mo, ang dami pa talagang ok na lalaki na single e...

Oh e tapos?

Sighs. Manonood nalang siguro ako ng Koreanovela.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 09:43 PM.

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TLDT
金曜日: May 29, 2020



Namiss ko bigla this guy who said pwede daw magtanong kahit busy.

Tas di magrereply. Lol.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 02:56 PM.

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Cruel
金曜日: May 29, 2020



Club anniversary's online celebration tonight. 

I haven't decided yet if I'm gonna go. I haven't read any messages, even those that I was tagged to. I don't want additional work. I don't want additional stress. I don't want to hear any more demands. I know this is a position I swore upon. A task I promised to do, but who cares.

Am I cruel? Well, it's not like they can't do this without me, you know. I just find them so exhausting, I can't bear having to give in to any more of their demands anymore. Lol, I know they might not even be demanding of anything right now. I wouldn't know. I haven't read the messagages. But still.

Normally, I think I'm so much more responsible than this.

Also, some of my friends will be there. And the new president is also my friend.... pero...

Have you ever felt like this, repulsed at the thought of having to deal with certain people again?

----

Sa kabila ng lahat, marami paring magandang bagay na nangyayari.

A friend who tested positive in COVID has tested negative twice na, so she's cleared. Ang bait ng Langit!

Also, ang sarap nung carbonara na inorder namin kahapon. Hehe.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:47 AM.

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Ambo
金曜日: May 15, 2020



I asked for a little rain. The Heavens gave me a storm.

Brownout. Lakas ng hangin. Binitbit ko yung kama ko sa kwarto ng parents ko dahil ang scary ng bagyo. Mom is way more scared than I am and this is not making me a little less scared. Well at least I'm not alone in fear. I can't believe that Dad is already snoring amidst all these.

Alis ka na, Ambo. Please bring COVID-19 with you.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 07:55 PM.

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Beauty in gloom
金曜日: May 15, 2020



Intended to finish another kdrama this "weekend", but ended up sleeping for 10hrs straight. My back hurts.

It's a beautiful cloudy morning. I'm hoping for a little rain. I love rain.

Parents are about to leave to withdraw money from their mini business. I haven't been really good to them lately. There're just the three of us at home, to whom will I throw my temper to?

I think I should be kinder.

Someone said na coronavirus is here to stay na and we just need to learn how to live with it. I feel neutral about this. Sabi nila, lahat daw ng bagay ay nangyayari for the greater good. Maybe this is for the greater good. Hindi ko rin naman talaga alam.

People can become nasty when they're afraid. I am afraid.

Or, well, maybe I'm just nasty.

-------

Uy, it's raining na.

Ang ganda ganda talaga ng ulan.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 08:53 AM.

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Doko ni mo ikitakunai
金曜日: May 8, 2020



Parents left home to the baranggay hall to get my quarantine pass. They asked the baranggay secretary to issue one for me since Mom, the quarantine pass holder in our household, doesn't know how to withdraw money from atm machine. Pumayag yung sec. Pwede na ko lumabas.

Teka, sino ba may sabing gusto ko lumabas?

The last time I went out during quarantine, I went to the market by foot. Nagpaltos ako, Bes. Pano kaya pag nag withdraw ako mamaya? Putek, ang ineeeeet.

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Spent my day yesterday in my parents room. Dun lang kasi may aircon. Every time na lumalabas ako ng kwarto nila, para akong piniprito. Nung gabi, dun na rin ako natulog. Nanginig naman ako sa ginaw. Lol. Buti today, hindi na ganun kainit. Or maybe, hindi pa. Gusto ko ng ice scream.

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It's been the longest that I haven't left home. Sinubukan kong alalahanin kung paano nga ulet mag commute papuntang opisina. Parang nakalimutan ko na kasi.

-------

Today still, gusto ko nang yumaman. Mayaman enough to have a choice.

Yun lang naman.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 09:45 AM.

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Off1
金曜日: April 17, 2020



So, paano magsisimula?

He approached in a diplomatic way. I'm not that harsh. I told him I've been busy. And that I've long been wanting to take a leave of absence. I don't know why talking with this person makes me feel emotionally exhausted every time. Siguro hindi nya naman talaga kasalanan. He said there are only 2 months left for the term, and asked for us to finish this together. I still feel tired. I know we're not at odds. If anything, we're actually allies. But... I don't know. 

I hope he'll stop pushing me into giving more time and energy than I have. I think this is the only way I can stay.

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Thursday off and I spent most of the day sleeping. Parents sleep early these days so I really only get to see them during meal time. Nasanay na akong gising sa gabi, kaya ito, gising pa ko.

Mejo tinatamaan ako ng lungkot these days. At siguro pagod din. Yung emotional na pagod na hindi napapawi ng tulog at pahinga. 

ECQ blues? 

Anong magandang Kdrama pang divert? Takte, di kaya ng puso ko yung Hotel del Luna. Pakdis, ang scary!



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Written by cinderellaareus at 02:50 AM.

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Good
金曜日: April 10, 2020



Spent the day sleeping. Tapos gigising lang para kumain. Nakipagkulitan sandali sa nanay ko at ng solve ng mga iq test sa fb. Ngayon eto, nasa kwarto ulet. Tambay ulet.

Sabi ng author ng isa sa mga books na naging influential sakin, mas powerful daw ang QUIET mind kesa sa POSITIVE mind. Naging sobrang effective nito sakin. Ang problema ko lang ngayong ecq, pag sinusubukan kong i-quiet ang isip ko, nakakatulog ako. Pag nagpapa quiet kasi ng isip, bawal magsalita, bawal magbasa, bawal manood ng tv or vid... lahat ng ito bawal for 2 hrs or longer. The longer the better. 

Law of pure potentiality.

I manifested mostly money. Nakuha ko down to my last spec. Pero syempre, not without a cost. I also asked for a person or two,  LOL. Seems like the Universe processes people a little longer. I ended up returning the goodies like defective items.

The Universe holds so much power. I think, we already know this. We're just too lazy to rediscover. Sabi sa book, even the most successful people in the history knew this.

Naisip ko lang si Hitler. He had a problematic childhood. He didn't finish his education, and once lived in homeless shelters. But look at what he was able to achieve. Hitler was surely evil, but boy, he was great. His charisma, his brilliance, this evil who was able to gain power--worst combination ever--we all know how he made history, don't we?

No wonder, I've never trusted Duterte...

I downloaded Hitler's book, Mein Kampf. I only looked at the snippets. Natatakot akong basahin. I remember what I felt when I read portions of 48 Laws of Power, or Machiavelli's Il Principe. Hindi ako sigurado kung gaano ako kabuting tao. I've always felt drawn to this kind of Philosophy even back when I was younger. In a way, ang weird din na hindi ako naging DDS.

Good Friday ngayon. Rest day ko. As usual, tamad na tamad parin akong kumilos. Sakali mang ma emerse ako sa mga prinsipyo ni Hitler at lumabas ang pagiging evil ko, siguro magiging safe parin ang mga tao sakin. To achieve what Hitler had, kailangan mo kumilos. I mean, nakakatamad kaya.

Babasahin ko na nga ang Mein Kampf. Pero magcha charge muna ko. 



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Written by cinderellaareus at 06:07 PM.

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TINWIE
金曜日: April 3, 2020



Good morning!

I just woke up. Napuyat ako kaka chat with friends and then sa panonood ng Chinese film na "This is not what I expected". Ang cute nung guy, naalala ko so Tony Stark. Kulang lang sa chemistry yung tandem nila ni girl, pero ok lang.

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Umagang umaga mejo tumataas na ang kilay ko. One of the things I hate e yung pinapakialaman ako sa oras ko or yung tinuturuan ako kung anong gagawin ko sa buhay ko...

Or maybe sadyang bad trip lang ako sa taong to. Irita ako sa choice of words nya. Hindi ko mapatulan, dahil technically, wala naman syang sinabing masama. Sa totoo lang, nag iisip na akonh umattend, pero dahil pakialamero sya, ayoko na.

People are sensitive these days. Choice of words is very crucial. Bigyan ko kaya to ng seminar? Leche.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 11:56 AM.

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"A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep"

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私の名前はZです。

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