Entries in category "金曜日"
Tita Inday, Mom's younger sis, is having a hard time sleeping so she decided to go to the province and see Tito Bibot's funeral- probably until burial. The elder sister, who happens to be my mother, decided to do the same. Mom asked if I have money. Since I'll be giving money for the expenses in the funeral, etc, waley na kong pera. Lol.
I don't like days like these. I am truly grateful for the money that I have... but Heavens... more please! Haha.
Ang sakit ng tiyan ko. T_T
09:13 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Home is where family is. My parents, brother, niece, sis-in-law... thet are my family. But aside from them, I have other people I consider family though we're not related by blood.
With them, I'm not afraid to be seen as "maarte". They already know. I eat food from their plates, and they sometimes finish mine. I often rest my arms on their back, or on their lap, with very little hesitation. When in a crowd of strangers, theirs are the faces that I first look for. They bully me a lot. I'll give them my most sarcastic retort. Then, we will laugh.
We correct eachother right on the face. We bully eachother and laugh about it together.
Well, hindi rin naman talaga perfect. Nagkaka bad tripan din. Naiirita din ako sa kanila madalas. Pero in the end of the day, sa piling nila, alam ko, I'm home. Isa sa mga pinagpapasalamat ko sa langit e yung hinayaan Nyang matagpuan ko ang mga taong to.
Contest today. Dahil nakipagpalit ako ng shift para rito, alam syempre ni TL. Sobrang lakas mang-asar nun. Sabi nya manonood daw sya at magdadala ng banner. Tas niyaya nya pa yung iba. Lol. Syempre joke lang naman yun.
Sa totoo lang, hindi ako masyadong friendly. I prefer to be alone over being with people I'm not comfortable with. On the 12th will be my 4th month here. I think I really like these people. They don't feel like home to me yet, pero sana over time, maging malapit din sa puso ko ang account na ito gaya nang nararamdaman ko para sa Elite. Challenge yun for me kasi nga, hindi ako friendly at mejo mahiyain pa ko. I love the concept of family. It would be nice if a day will come that I'll start considering these people as family.
Placed 2nd sa Evaluation contest. We will be sending 2 contestants per contest sa Area Contests on January. This means I'll be competing by then. Gusto ko maging national champion. Tinatamad din talaga ko. Pero wala lang, para makapag papansin lang sa mga crush ko, ganun. Lol.
Yung mga friends ko nag eexpand na ng pamilya, ako napapansin parin sa crush.
May nirereto sakin si Diana na lalaki. A Korean dude in his 30s. Pulis daw work nito sa Korea. Ayoko talaga ng foreigner at mas lalong ayoko sa pulis, pero naisip ko na date lang naman at hindi naman kami magpapakasal, so I told her, "sige, go."
Naalala ko yung sabi ni Andee. Single women should date a lot daw. Hindi para kilalanin yung guy, kundi para mas makilala mo pa yung sarili mo.
Sa totoo lang, nakakatamad makipagdate lalo na't hindi naman talaga ako interesado. Still, bring it on.
12:03 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
P: nakita mo ba yung post ko? Ba't di mo nila like posts ko?
He will be going to his province in Romblon for a week-long vacay starting Saturday.
Z: mamimiss kita
P: grabe, 1 week lang naman yun
* joke kasi yun (na half-meant). Di pa tapos yung punch line, kinikilig ka na. Hmp!
P: your endearment makes me kilig
Z: san naman nanggaling yan?
P: wala nabasa ko lang
P: ambango mo ngayon
Z: *dodges the topic*
He sent me an email template that I can use to send to the users we support for an easier transaction. The email contains screenshots with circles and arrows done free hand, probably through MS Paint, tas mukhang drawing bata, so I often tease him about it.
Z: grabe, professional na professional.
*after seeing me forward exact same email to different users*
P: grabe, makalait ka sa sinend ko sayo, tas ngayon gamit na gamit.
Pag umooverboard sya sa pang-aasar, sina side hug nya yung taong inaasar nya to compensate. He does that to everyone.
But I'm pretty sure, there was never a single day since he went back to day shift na hindi nya ko ni-hug.
Syempre, hindi naman ako nag rereklamo.
Pag ito nahulog sa arms ko, ay takte, di ko pakakawalan to. Wapakels na kahit ano pa sya. Gay or whatnot.
12:34 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Just a few days back, I wondered why I haven't been having dreams. But just last night, I had one. And it got me wake up feeling so bad I feel like I will never be happy again.
Part of me feels certain that that dream is actually true. Damn, I'm nobody's mouse.
"Bakit ang tahimik mo ngayon?" Coworker asked me for the nth time today. How am I supposed to answer that?
Isn't it odd? The things that hurt us the most, we find so hard to talk about.
My heart hurts.
03:14 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Mom just told me last night that 2 nights back, someone threw a rock the size of a soup bowl to the bus that my brother was riding in. Tinamaan sya sa leeg. Sabi nya ok naman daw si Kuya pero hinihintay pa ang result ng ultrasound. Ang dami talagang gag* sa Pilipinas. Nakakainis. If the rock landed in the wrong place, I could've lost a brother, and my niece a Dad. Nakakapikon.
Still, I'm just happy that he's not dead.
On a happy note, I just found out that sis-in-law is pregnant. We're having a new baby! It breaks my heart though when Mom told be that my niece was crying when they were joking about it. Sana naman matanggap to ng pamangkin ko. I love that munchkin so much.
Then it goes that my cousins started asking, "si <insert my name here>, kelan?" I wish I know the answer.
Lumindol kanina. Hindi ko manlang nadama. Pero pinalabas kaming lahat ng building and we stayed outside for about 3 hrs. Feeling ko kung co#3 to, nasa work station parin kami convincing ourselves na walang nangyari.
I was with the rest of the j-speakers nang mapansin ko na malapit samin si Sir P-- the guy from TA na kausap ko lagi nung hinahire palang ako. Yung unang crush ko sa co na to. I was trying not to look his way, pero maya maya, lumapit sya samin at nangamusta. Kwento dito, kwento dun. Nalaman ko na sya pala ang dahilan kung bakit ang laki ng sahod ko. At nalaman ko rin na pare pareho lang ang sahod namin ng mga newly hired j-speakers. Sabi nya, "nilalagay ko talaga yung pinakamataas, sayang kasi e." Grabe, ang bait nya. Gusto ko na talaga sya i-hug kanina. Ang swerte ko dahil sya ang na assign na TA samin.
May mga bagay na nagbago sa damdamin ko today. Hindi ko rin alam. Siguro next week, malalaman ko.
His shift will be 10am-7pm. Only 1 hr earlier than mine. Sat-Sun na rin ang rest days nya. And this sched is of his own choosing.
Only 2 weeks left of September though. I wonder what my shift will be by October. Magpapang-abot kaya kami? Bahala na.
09:23 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Friday. Apat na araw na kong may sakit. Last Tuesday, 10 hrs akong natulog. 10 effin hours, all in the hope na gumaling na ko kinabukasan. Mejo effective, di na ko nilagnat na ffg day. Pero bumalik ulet kinagabihan, at hanggang ngayon hindi pa ko nilulubayan ng lagnat, ubo, sipon at sakit ng ulo. Aabsent sana ko kaninang umaga kahit na alam kong wala pa kong leave, pero naisip kong 3x a week ko nga lang sya nakikita, aabsent pa ko. Haha. Harot.
I asked him if Pe*** is still leaving. He said, "tingin ko hindi na rin aalis yun. Hindi nya na ko tinatanong e."
Hindi na RIN??? Hindi ka na ba aalis?
Lol. Ewan. Baka heto ko hoping they will stay tas ako pala yung aalis. Haha. Ewan ulet.
Getting sickly lately. I'm seriously considering na mag resign na from my position sa club. Napapagod ako. Siguro dahil may sakit ako ngayon. O baka sadyang pagod lang ako.
11am to 8pm parin ang shift ko. For the whole month na daw ng Sept. PK said, baka morning na daw sya next month. Magpapang-abot parin naman siguro. Keri lang. I think this shift is the most ideal for me.
Pag nag shift ang rotation may chance na mapunta ako sa 4am to 1pm shift. Hayst... hindi ko sure kung kaya ko yun. Kaya ko ba yun? Kailangan ko na bang humanap ng bagong trabaho? I really like it here. : (
Sighs. Ang sama ng pakiramdam ko. T_T
09:38 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Ang busy ng buhay. I no longer chew my food. I just swallow it right away. Lol.
1 hr lunch is not enough to answer chat and messages outside work. I felt Mom's disappointment when I told her I'm not going home tonight. On Sunday, it's my brother's birthday.
Oh wait, here's my food.
01:23 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
Feels like a jobless weekday today. My brother's out to pick my niece from Cavite, it took me some time to realize that, 'wait, today is Sunday!' and 'no, you're no longer jobless'.
I don't feel so high and happy today. No particular reason. I just don't. Maybe that's okay.
Natuwa ako sa napanood ko sa Sacred Sky. The seer said something like, "it's true that it is in darkness that we can create and become creative, but you have to realize that you don't have to stay there. YOU CAN ALSO CREATE IN THE LIGHT. And there's clarity the light can provide that the darkness couldn't."
It took me some time, and I've faught so many battles. But now I can feel like I'm no longer drawn to the darkness and it's such a relief. I don't know if one can really continue to be an artist even after leaving the darkness. But if not, then so be it. I don't really mind being normal. I think 'average' is underrated. All fine.
At the orientation a few days back, I felt like I'm walking on eggshells at first. I wanted so much to blend in that I found myself downplaying everything abt myself just so people woundn't feel uncomfortable around me. I heard their story. I know we're different. But then I realized, "bakit?"
I think we shouldn't underestimate other people's ability to accept those who are different from them. I know this stems from my own difficulty in relating to those who are different from me. Siguro kailangan mo rin lang talagang subukan.
So I told them I'd be working as a j-bilingual. They had the idea right off about the possible pay. Of course, I didn't tell them. They said, "shala ka pala", so sabi ko, "hindi rin." In the end, ok naman. Sinabi ko rin na wala nga akong ipon, which is true. Baka nga better pa sila sakin on that department.
When they asked, I also told them I was an engineer doing bridge projects in Japan. Some of them gasped, but it didn't make them treat me like an alien afterwards. Siguro nga hindi talaga dapat natin i-underestimate ang kakayahan ng mga tao sa pagtanggap.
I'll be meeting the account on Monday. Hindi naman kasi talaga ako masyadong friendly and it's making me a little anxious. I want all of us to be in good terms at the very least, pero ideally, sana maging friends ko sila. And I know friendship don't just happen... or does it?
Sh*t, I'm probably just being my control freak self again.
During the orientation, marami na kagad bagay akong na miss sa dati kong company. Una sa lahat, yung bidet. Kasi putek, red days ko kaya, hindi ba necessity naman talaga ang bidet?
Nung nag talk yung head ng facilities, I brought out the need for bidet. I felt like it raised the eyebrows of some people there and someone asked me, "wala naman talagang bidet normally, di ba?" It puzzled me because lahat ng pinanggalingan kong company may bidet. First world problem. I know right. But I don't plan to give it a rest hangga't hindi naglalagay ng bidet ang facilities. Hindi naman kailangan na sa lahat ng cubicle e. Kahit isa lang per floor. Ang mura mura lang nun e.
And I also miss the free wifi. Sabi ng kapatid ko, hindi naman daw talaga normal na may free wifi, and I was like, "bakit?"
Pero gets ko. Siguro dapat i-tone daw din ang kaartehan, dahil, hello, kapapasok ko lang dito.
When I started in my previous co, wala rin naman bidet at wifi. So nung nagkaroon ng pa survey, I asked for bidet. I also asked for a full-length mirror sa cr. Both were provided a few days later. No, I didn't ask for free wifi. Maybe they're just feeling generous.
In fairness sa co na to, at least meron silang gym. Sana naman maglagay na rin sila ng bidet.
Sighs. Ang gloomy ng araw na ito. Baka kailangan ko lang maligo. Nakakatamad. -_-
10:48 AMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。
12nn-9pm. We had our orientation today, tas putek, alas siete palang antok na antok na ko.
I thought of going home, pero box office ang pila sa fx, so I'm in Manda now. Dapat pala dumaan na ko sa prev co para matapos na. I'm yet to do the recording they're asking me to do.
Ok lang naman. Willing naman akong gawin yung recording. Ayoko lang pumunta dun ng gabi. Wala kasi akong kakilala sa mga night shift people. Tas yung taong pupuntahan ko pa e nakaupo sa pinaka kalagitnaan ng buong office.
Any introvert will understand kung gaano kalaking torture ang lumakad sa sea of strangers, not knowing what to do. Kaya eto, kahit hassle sakin, pagpipilitan ko talagang pumunta dun ng umaga. Sa Monday na. At least konti lang ang tao at lahat sila, kilala ko.
So back to my Day 1 at Company no.4... Wow! Naka apat na pala ko. When I was in co#1, I was worried at the thought na tumanda na ako dun at hindi ko man lang naranasan kung paano magtrabaho sa ibang kompanya. Oh, now look at me! Already on my 4th. Congratulations, Z!
Ok... I keep deviating from the topic. Back to my 1st day at work, well, ok naman. Halos puro kami babae sa orientation, so hindi masyadong masaya. Lol.
The highlight of the day was that I needed to sign again the contract kasi may mali. So I got to see Sir P again. Wash day ata nila today coz he was wearing t-shirt. I usually see him in a more formal getup. Cute parin naman. Mukhang bagong gupit yata sya. Ngayon ko nga lang napansin na kamukha nya pala si Mr. Chill.
Hindi ako visual na tao, I'm more auditory. Pero yung mga lalaking nagugustuhan ko physically, ganito ata yung common. Mejo dark (basta hindi maputi), tamang cute lang, simple hairstyle, parang laging nakangiti yung eyes, tas yung may distinct na way kung ngumiti. Ang cute ng taong yun pag ngumingiti sya.
Sana ganito yung mapang-asawa ko. Yung gwapo sa paningin ko. Kahit sa paningin ko lang. Ako naman titingin e. Haha.
I was the only new hire from our acct. And every time the hr mentioned my name, she went like, "ah yung Japanese. Yung kay Paolo." And the whole time I was like, "so I'm Paolo's now?"
Pinakikilig ang sarili. Shet, ang highschool. Lol.
Sa Monday I'll meet the people from my acct. I don't really have any expectations whatsoever. Pero sana lang, makasundo ko sila. Or if the Heavens will be a little more generous, maybe He can also help me be good friends with them. Maybe I can get to see this acct as my second home. Maybe I can stay here for good. Well again, wala naman akong expectations. But my hopes are high.
Sana maging maayos ang lahat.
11:33 PMにcinderellaareus によって書かれました。