Entries for October, 2021



Fire
火曜日: October 5, 2021



Ang ganda ng ulan kanina. Nakakatamad tuloy pumasok.

Ang weird ng feeling ko lately. Parang lagi kong gustong maghamon ng away. Fighting it is quite a struggle. Pag nagchachat ako, I'll pause muna bago ko isend. Naiirita ako sa ibang mga kasama ko sa work. I don't hate them though. I'm just annoyed. 

Hormones ba to? I want to be a bright and happy human, at hindi yung ganitong mainit lagi yung ulo.

A friend said she's seeking professional help para sa mental health nya. I've long been wanting to see a psychiatrist. Kaso di ata covered ng health card, balita ko mahal daw, at tinatamad din talaga ko.

A friend ask, "anong wish mo?", I answered 3 million pesos.

Pangpagawa ng sarili kong bahay. 

Pero kung sakaling you'll be granted 1 wish, yung tipong sure na matutupad pag winish mo, what will your wish be?

I'm no sure if I like my answer.

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Putting off watching Boruto's latest episode. Tokwa, na deds na ata si Kurama. Huhu. Masyadong mapanakit yung nagsulat neto. T_T



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Written by cinderellaareus at 12:39 PM.

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日曜日: October 10, 2021



Ang pogi ni Abarai Renji ng Bleach, no? I stopped watching when I got sick. 2 nights back ko nalang ulet naalala. Mejo nakalimutan ko na tuloy ang kwento.

Inuubo pa rin ako. Lalo atang lumalala nung kumain ako ng cake, cassava cake, at pichi pichi about 4 days back. My cough was particularly nasty yesterday, so I resorted to some desperate measure.

500 ml water, plus 15 drops of 3% hydrogen peroxide, then a tiny pinch of borax--- made 2 bottles of this same mixture and drank throughout the day (total of 1 liter). The cough did improve quickly, but as much as possible, I don't want to consume this concoction kasi pag nagkamali at na deds ako, baka ma headline pa ko ng "babae, uminom ng borax, patay". Jahe di ba.

Flouride is actually a more lethal poison than cynide, pero di tayo nadededs kahit kainin natin yung toothpaste because of the very small amount. Same goes with borax. 

May konting ubo pa ko. But not as bad as yesterday. Tokwa, isang buwan na kong inuubo.

Gutom na ko. But I'm scared of eating the different junk foods on my drawer, dahil baka lalo akong ubuhin. Dahil dito, I still weigh 2 kilos less than how I did before I got sick. Not a bad exchange. Pero gusto ko paring gumaling.

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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:34 AM.

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Maring
火曜日: October 12, 2021



Ang lakas ng ulan. Nakakatamad magtrabaho. Ang sarap umupo sa sofa at magmuni muni. Pero pag wala akong pasok at umuulan, hindi naman ako umuupo sa sofa para magmunimuni.

Kagabi, I was reading Earthclinic's archive from Ted. I realized how there were people who spent their lives being sick. Having been sick for a while myself, narealize ko na yung mga simpleng bagay pala— kahit yung ability mo lang to smell, breathe without discomfort, or even our appetite—sobrang laking blessings na pala. At kahit yung mga boring days na madalas nating ireklamo, isang malaking biyaya rin.

I'm truly grateful. Marami pong salamat, Universe.

My greatest fear is losing my family. Maybe next to that is not having enough money to give my family and myself a good life. Siguro hanggat okay ako sa mga area na to, there will always be something to be very grateful for.

Salamat talaga, Universe.

After today, 1 more work day at off ko na. I'd probably spend tbe day playing Battle Realm and Harvest Town, then maybe at night, watch Bleach. Okay lang kahit di remarkable. Basta sana, kasama ko pa rin ang mga taong mahalaga sa akin, pati mga pusa ko.

Balang araw, yayaman ako enough na hindi ko na kailangang pilitin ang sarili kong magtrabaho. I'd give my parents an even better life than this. I will bring them to beautiful places, make them eat great food. I wish that the Heavens will let us live longer pa to experience all these.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:46 AM.

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mga bagay na gusto kong kainin kapag hindi na ko inuubo
火曜日: October 12, 2021



Kanina ang dami kong naiisip, pero ngayon, gusto ko lang ng Fibisco Peanut Crunch. T_T



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Written by cinderellaareus at 02:38 PM.

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Float
水曜日: October 13, 2021



Last night I learned na the cn-manila agents ng team namin e madidissolve na. Not sure why, basta gusto daw kasi ng client na sa Chengdu na manggaling yung support. The company will find another account to transfer them to. Habang wala pa, floating sila. May bayad naman daw, pero basic lang. A huge chunk of our salary comes from the language allowance. Basic is only about 20% of the entire thing.

The JP team of my previous company also got dissolved. I still remember the pain of uncertainty that I felt back then. It makes me feel sorry for my officemates. Yung iba sa kanila, nauna pa sakin sa company. Though I think they will never run out of other options naman, since multilinguals are always in demand, but ours is a good company kasi e. Tingin ko magdadalawang isip din silang lumipat.

Iniisip ko kung mangyayari din ba to sa JP team. Sana hindi. Nakakatamad nang maghanap ng trabaho ulet. 

Kaya mahirap talaga maging empleyado. Sabagay. Wala namang madali. Ang boring rin naman ng buhay kung laging madali.

Gusto ko nang yumaman.

Paano ba nagiging milyonaryo yung ibang mga tao?

Kahit mag save ka ng 20k per month, 240k lang ang mase save mo save mo sa isang taon. You'll still be 76% short from having 1 million.

Yung binebenta kong cat food, kahit consistent ang benta, 500 lang ang kinikita ko in 3 weeks. Yun namang shoppee shop ko, sa 6 books na nabenta ko, 1200 lang ang kinita ko. The actual price of those books were so much higher.

A few years back, na hire ako as interpreter sa event ng G-shock. 4 hours na pagpapacute, pero kumita ako ng 2.5 days worth of my salary, may free lunch pa. 

Alam kong may mas efficient way na kumita ng pera. Hindi ganitong todo effort ka para sa kapirasong kita.

Pero pano ba?



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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:40 AM.

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Getsuyoubi
月曜日: October 25, 2021



Monday. Nakakatamad pumasok kahit work from home.

I always need to remind myself how grateful I am for this job.

I want to be rich enough to have the choice on how I'd spend my own day. Ganern.

Namimiss ko na magtravel. I want to bring my parents to different countries pa. Baka mag japan kami pag vaccinated na kami. Kaso, kailangan ko pang mag ipon para sa future. Pero tingin ko, I need to bring my parents sooner, because Dad is finding it harder to walk lately. Alam ko makoconvice ko rin to na mag wheelchair pag nagtatravel kami para di sya mapagod. Free ang wheelchair pag kinarga sa airplane, if tama alala ko.

Gusto ko rin dalhil sila mama sa Australia. Mas mahal nga lang. Pero kaya ko yan. Kakayanin.

Been spending my time playing Harvest Town lately. Naaaliw ako pag nakakahanap ako ng way to earn more money dun sa laro.

Dati nasa 30k lang yung pera ko dun, ngayon over 100k na. The method was very easy, I'd probably reach millions today pag nag laro ako ulet.

Pano ko ba to iaapply sa real life? Ano ba ang easy and effective way to earn a looooooot of money?

When I was watching Goblin, naisip ko na if you're living for thousands of years, it's a given na yayaman ka talaga. Pero naisip ko, kung ako yung mabubuhay for thousands of years, with this same money skill... ewan ko. Yayaman ba ko?

Tingin ko, with enough skill, hindi mo kailangan ng thousands of years para yumaman. Paano ba?

Clear pa rin naman ako sa gusto ko. Money is just the tool. Freedom will still be the goal. Jeeeeeez. Someday, soon. Sana magawa ko to.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:21 AM.

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Ways ways
火曜日: October 26, 2021



Kaya mo bang ispend ang isang buong araw na hindi nagrereklamo.

Kaya ko to back in the day. Petiks naman kasi ang work ko noon. Pero ngayon, bwisit na bwisit ako sa ilan sa mga kasama ko sa work.

May admin issue daw kaya pag may ticket na need ng admin, papasa samin? Wow!

I had an admin issue before and it got fixed in less that 48 hours. Kahit wala pa akong admin, nakagawa naman ako ng paraan. Yung isang kasama ko na may admin issue, tinulungan pa nung isa kong kasama to get it fixed. Mali mali kasi ung request na sinasubmit kaya di naayos. Yung TL at SME namin, hinahayaan lang na yung agents e may admin issues. Ano kaya yun?

Ang toxic ko na siguro sa paningin nila dahil panay ang reklamo ko. Minsan naiisip ko rin na baka ako na pala yung mali.

kainis pa, pag check ko nung KB sa ticket, di naman need ng admin. Sya mismo nag attach nung KB. Nasabi ko tuloy kay TL na parang para paraan nalang lagi nyang ginagawang excuse na wala syang admin. TL is still neutral about it.

Ako ba yung mali? Posible. Naiirita talaga ko. Alam ko, there are bosses and officemates out there who are so much worse. Hindi naman ako galit sa kanila. Ayoko lang talagang i-tolerate.

Surprisingly, I feel a whole lot calmer after writing this. Salamat, Tabulas.

Ang hirap kumalma these days.

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Nalock ako sa loob ng banyo the last time. Sira yung knob. Hindi kumagat yung susi kaya sinira nalang ng tatay ko yung pinto ng banyo para makalabas ako.

Mom is pressing me about marriage lately. Sabi nya, pano daw ako pag wala na sila. Naalala ko tuloy nung nalock ako sa banyo. Kung mag-isa siguro ako sa buhay, anong gagawin ko para makalabas? Naisip ko e baka baliin ko yung shower at ipukpok ko sa pinto, to get rid of the knob. Naisip ko rin na siguro, mas mainam na pag nagpagawa ako ng bahay, wala nalang knob yung banyo.

Marriage. Ewan ko. Masaya ba talaga ang mga may asawa? Siguro hindi naman ganito lahat ng husbands, pero pag naiisip ko na sisigaw sigawan lang ako ng asawa ko, parang mas gusto ko nalang mag-isa kahit pa makulong ako sa banyo at walang tumulong sakin.

36 na pala ako. When my birthday came, I was thinking the whole time na 37 na ko. The days went by with me believing na 37 na nga ako, until bff sent me a belated happy birthday message with my correct age in it. Lol. Kung hindi nya ko binati, hanggang ngayon siguro, naniniwala parin akonna 37 na ko.

36... ano na? Anong gagawin ko sa buhay ko?



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Written by cinderellaareus at 10:35 AM.

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1AM thoughts
金曜日: October 29, 2021



Gusto kong maging sobrang yaman. Yung tipong kaya kong kumain sa fine dining kahit di ko kayang basahin yung menu.

Tipong kaya kong bumili ng damit na 6 digits ang presyo.

Yung kaya kong magbakasyon sa kahin saang bansa ko gusto.

At sana maranasan ko lahat ng ito kasama ng mga mahahalagang tao sa buhay ko.



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Written by cinderellaareus at 12:58 AM.

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C I N D E R E L L A A R E U S
"A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep"

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私の名前はZです。

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