Entries for May, 2021



Kin
月曜日: May 3, 2021



Monday. Golden week sa Japan, so holiday until Wednesday. I'm expecting less calls today. So far  25 minutes na kong avail.

Nagsimula akong magbenta ng cat food. Yung binili ko ng 95 pesos, binenta ko ng 120. Naubos na lahat kahapon. Bumili ako ng 1 sack na 22 kilos. Base sa kalkulasyon ko, considered na ang 100 off sa shipping, coins spent at coins earned, e aabot sa kulang kulang 800 pesos ang kikitain ko. Pangarap ko na bago matapos ang pandemic e mayaman na ako enough para di ko na need mag trabaho. Ang hirap pala. Hahanap pa ko ng mas mabilis at mas effortless na paraan. Naiisip ko talaga e Youtube. Or maybe mag game streamer nalang kaya ko and show portions of my boobs to earn money? LOL.

I don't judge people who do that. I think that's a very effective marketing strategy. Pero ayoko parin gawin yun. Hahaha. I also suck at games. I wonder if people will notice that you're not good, when they're busy looking at your boobs, no? Hahaha.

I'm thinking Youtube. Maybe I don't have to be seen on the video. Basta iisip ako ng way.

I'm trying to gather 100k para mapagawa yung harap ng bahay namin kung saan nilalagay ni mama yung mga sinampay. She's stepping on the old roof--remnants ng dati naming bahay. It looks creaky and dangerous. Mom will pay, but she doesn't have the money yet, so I'll lend her. I need to raise this money fast.

Kailangang mag tipid ng bongga. Or pwede naman benta ko nalang yung dollars ko ng palugi. Or mag benta ng stocks. Lol. I think I'd go for mag tipid ng bongga.

Sana manalo ako ng 10k shopee pay credits. Mamiss ko mag online shopping. T_T



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 09:47 AM.

コメントを書く





Honesty
水曜日: May 5, 2021



Truth daw ang theme ng month ko for this month, according to Jane. 

I've noticed a lot of changes with the way I see things these days.

Was it the pandemic that caused this shift? Or was it... time?

Maybe both. I don't know.

I've been raising my eyebrows a lot these days.

Dati dati, sa kaunting pakilig, iniisip ko na agad if the guy's surname sounds good when attached to my name. Lol. These days, I seem to ask a whole lot of questions. 

Does he earn enough?

In his age, what he had achieved so far?

What? He was sick? Did he get into a huge debt because of that?

Alright, he earns well, but how are his parents? What if we got divorced? I heard people in France are required to split their assets after divorce? I don't want to share my hard-earned money! Should I learn more about prenup agreement?

Futuristic pa rin. Only different. Ewan. Sa totoo lang  parang ayoko na. Lol.

My mind is occupied in thinking of ways to get myself out. Of freeing myself from being a corporate slave. Surely, earning this much to answer a few calls a day doesn't seem to be a bad kind of slavery...

But this is not what I want. Hindi talaga.

Kaya basta, gagawa ako ng way. Sana magawa ko to.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 11:12 AM.

コメントを書く





18
日曜日: May 9, 2021



Lee Do-Hyun. I just finished watching 18 Again. Takte, ang gwagwapo ng mga Koreans na 'to, hindi makatarungan. Lol.

Shift will be moved an hour later just for tomorrow. Request ng client, at all jp calls lang. Universe, help me.

Sa totoo lang, gusto ko mag absent. Mom rescued a kitten 2 weeks ago. I named her Hamanya. Her tummy was big when we got her. Until now malaki pa rin. I sent a message to the vet about a week back to ask if pwede ko nang i-deworm dahil nga makaki tiyan. Vet advised to bring her to the clinic first. I wasn't able to go last Thursday. Mejo matamlay sya these past few days. I'm scared that things can get worse if I'll wait pa. Sana payagan ako mag VL sa Tuesday. 



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 11:17 PM.

コメントを書く





Change Plans
月曜日: May 10, 2021



Hindi ok. I haven't been for a long while already.

Change plans. Dad and I will check NHA on my rest days to look for available land I can buy. Mom agreed na hindi na ipapagawa yung harap bahay. I'll just buy my own land and build a house.

When we were in Taiwan and Mel asked my mom kung kanino sya sasama pag bumukod na ko ng bahay. She said sakin daw dahil ako yung bunso. I was like, "as if"! From how things look, I was probably right.

Kaya ko kaya to mag-isa? Well, financially, sarili ko lang naman talaga ang aasahan ko. But once I made it, pag nagkaron na ko ng sarili kong bahay, kaya ko ba talaga mag-isa? Mabuhay ng ako lang mag-isa kasama ng mga pusa ko?

Ang alam ko lang, ayoko na talaga dito. 

Dun din naman pupunta to. Mainam na rin siguro para mas mabilis akong masanay.

-------

TL approved my VL request for tomorrow. Ang bait talaga nun. Will bring my Hamanya to vet. This cat fits the palm of my hand. Sobrang laki ng cat carriers ko sa bahay. Mas mabigat pa yung carrier kesa sa pusa. Sana malapit nalang ang vet dito. Good luck bukas.

-------

Hay, Universe. Hindi ako masaya today.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 10:12 PM.

コメントを書く





Saan punta?
土曜日: May 15, 2021



Dissatisfaction. Eto ata ang nararamdaman ko today. Maybe the same for these past years.

Pinanood ko ulet yung Slam Dunk. Hindi ko kasi yun nakompleto at paunti unti lang ang napanood ko dahil ata sa school. 70ish eps out of 101. Naalala ko ulet kung bakit ko pinangarap na matutong mag japanese at magpunta sa Japan. Tagalog dubbed yung pinanood ko. May mga part na naka Japanese at hindi naidub at wala ring subs. Nagbunga rin siguro ang mga pangarap, dahil naintindihan ko naman. Pati yung konting mali sa translation ng nakasulat sa title, nababasa ko rin. Olrayt di ba?

Nakakamiss yung mga panahon na meron pa akong pangarap. Yung seryosong pangarap talaga. Tipong handa kang isugal lahat pag nakakita ka ng opportunity na matupad yung pangarap mo.

Naalala ko dati, kaya ko gustong gusto ang mga anime kasi naiinspire akong mangarap at maging better. Gayang ngayong nanonood ako ng slam dunk. But it's so much different now though.

What can a 36 year old woman dream about?

I, too, had my own glorious days, you know. Hindi kasing dramatic ng pagkakapanalo ng Shohoku against Shoyo, but maybe a little close. What's even better was that they were real.

Saan ba nanggagaling ang dissatisfaction na ito?

Apparently, hindi pala talaga sa pera nasusukat ang success ng tao. Ang daming factor e.

Masaya ka ba sa ginagawa mo?

Masaya ba ang relationships mo?

Dama mo bang kapakipakinabang ka?

Napupunan mo ba financially ang mga pangangailangan mo at ng mga tao o bagay na mahahalaga sayo?

Siguro pag 'oo' ang sagot mo sa lahat ng ito, successful ka na ngang talaga.

Umupo ako nung isang araw para mag compute.

4% p.a. interest

12% tax (sa computation ko, nasa 15% ang totoong bawas).

Ilan ang need kong iinvest para magkaron ng kita mula sa interest na katumbas ng sahod ko para di na ko magtrabaho.

37M ang sagot. Kahit itabi ko pa kalahati ng sahod ko every month, it will take me 77 years para maka ipon ng 37M. Lol.

Hindi talaga investments lang ang sagot. Kailangan ko talaga ng cash flow.

Hindi rin siguro worth it na magtipid buong buhay mo. Ni hindi mo nga alam kung hanggang kelan ka mabubuhay. And for the same reason, ang sakit siguro to spend your life doing things you don't like to do just to earn money.

Ito ba yun? Yung source ng dissatisfaction? Hindi ko alam. It could also be my relationships. That department is in a really bad state at the moment.

Para ang poorly managed ng buhay ko these days.

------

Nilipat ng TL namin ang work sched ko sa 6AM-3PM. Starting on Monday daw. Magugulo ang rhythm ng buhay namin ng mga alaga kong pusa. Sobrang aga. Bahala na.

Ano bang gusto kong gawin? Nung bata pa ko, siguradong sigurado ako sa mga bagay na gusto ko.

Makagraduate ng 5 years lang without extension sa college.

Makapasa sa board exam, 1 take.

Matuto ng foreign language.

Pumunta sa Japan.

Early 20s nung matupad ko lahat ng mga pangarap ko. Hindi madali. Hindi joke yung hirap na pinagdaanan ko, at ang daming beses din akong umiyak. Pero naalala ko na those days, ganado akong bumabangon kahit alam kong magiging mahirap ang araw na haharapin ko.

Kaya ba ko naiinis dahil masyado nang madali ang lahat? 

Hindi naman sa madali. Nahihirapan din naman ako sa trabaho. Ewan ko ba.

Siguro gusto ko lang ng direksyon.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 11:55 AM.

コメントを書く





Nubenta
金曜日: May 21, 2021



Natapos ko na ang anime at manga ng Slam Dunk. Tokwa, bitin. After ilang dekada, may continuation pa daw ata ito. Ang nakakainis pag nakakapanood ka or nakakabasa ng maganda, pag natapos mo na, parang feeling mo napapariwara na buhay mo. Lol.

In a way tingin ko nagbago na ko. Hindi ko na nagiging crush ang mga anime characters. Hahaha! Si Sendo ata ang crush ko dati. Or si Rukawa ba? Hindi ko na maalala. Pero mahal ko talaga si Sakuragi. He's so adorable. 

Kung tama ang naaalala ko, ang major anime crush ko e si Seravi ng Akazukin Chacha. Sobrang crush ko rin si Killua. Puno ng poster nya ang kwarto namin dati.

Nakakamiss ang alalahanin ang nakaraan. Magaganda parin ba ang anime these days? Puro na kasi kdrama ang napapanood.

Hayst. Eto na naman yung hollow feeling. Baka after effect ng panonood at pagbabasa ng slamdunk.

Parang naha highlight ang dullness ng buhay pag nanonood ka ng action-packed na series no?

------

Back to work tomorrow. I hope having watched slam dunk again will make my heart warmer for the JP users na makakausap ko bukas.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 09:16 PM.

コメントを書く





Time Oras Jikan
土曜日: May 22, 2021



Work now. Relatively unbusy. In less than two hours, out na ko.

I miss my girl-friends from TM. Though we're still very active in group chat, nakakamiss na makasama sila sa mga TM-related adventures. Namimiss ko sumali at manood ng contest. I miss meeting new people. Parang ang interesting ng mga taong nami meet nila all over the world, now na naka online meeting na ang lahat. Ang pogi nung crush ng isa sa mga friends ko na TM from Japan. Single daw ata. Ayiiii!!!

Naalala ko tuloy si Saito. Una ko syang nakilala sa office pantry sa Main office namin sa Chiba. Nilalaro nya kasi yung bola nya ng soccer tas tinamaan ako sa paa. After nun nakipag kwentuhan na. Pogi kamo nun. Takte, ang dami kayang pogi sa kanila. Mejo nayabangan lang ako kay Saito kaya hindi ko sya siguro naging crush. Physically, sobrang perfect ang beauty nya sa taste ko. Si Shibuya-san ang naging crush ko non. Hindi sya kasing pogi, pero ang bait nya at mejo mahiyain. Kay Murakami-san ako madalas tuksihin ng lahat. Mejo naawa na nga ako sa taong yun. Sobrang lakas kasi mang asar ng mga kasama ko. Kamusta na kaya sila?

Ang tagal na panahon na pala ang lumipas. Ang dami nang nangyari. Nakakatuwa na ang dami paring magagandang memory na naiwan, kahit na yung mga tao na nasa memory ko, hindi ko na nakikita pa.

Gusto ko sana mag TM ulet. Kaso kahit wala akong pasok ng Friday, sobrang aga ng pasok ko the following day. Kaya ko naman magpuyat. But the cats sleep in my room. Kinukulong ko sila sa kwarto ko around 6pm tas lights off na by 8pm. Nakakaawa kasi pag nagbukas ako ng pinto sa umaga, tas humihikab pa sila. Sobrang nakakaawa. I want them to have enough sleep. Though they're bigger now, they're still kittens. Siguro may workaround naman. Bahala na. Mag-iisip ako.

Hayst. Nabobored ako. Kailangan ko ng konting challenge.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 02:31 PM.

コメントを書く





PDT
水曜日: May 25, 2021



Isasama kami sa backup ng Bi*life. Even back when Dennison was still here, backup naman na ko. Pero hindi ganito ka-tedious. Gather lang ng info tas pasa. Sabay ngayon parang andami agad ipapagawa?

Sabi ni Gelo magreresign na daw sya. Di maganda management. Gusto ko na rin magresign. Pero syempre, naiisip ko kung gaano kamahal ang cat food. Naiinis ako.

Ang sarap siguro nung magkaroon ng kalayaan na twing ayaw mo na, alis ka lang kagad no? Pero alam ko hindi naman to applicable sa lahat ng bagay. I'm sure may punto sa buhay ng mga nanay natin na ayaw na nila. Imagine kung ano kaya ang kinahinatnat ng bawat pamilya kung lahat ng nanay (or tatay) e aalis nalang pag ayaw na nila.

I don't want to be married with my job. I want to be one day free enough to leave whenever I feel like it. Naiinis kasi ako. Siguro ang mas makakainis e on how it feels so unfair. Lol. Siguro nga hindi ganun karami ang pdt calls, pero yung feeling na hindi patas yung pinaka nakakapagpa down sakin. Mas nakakadagdag ng stress yung feeling na agrabyado ka. I did raised my concern to our TL. Though I like that he's chill, I'm sad because I couldn't feel like he's someone we can rely upon. I know it could be worse, but still.

We're already supporting 2 languages. Japanese alone is hard enough. Ngayon may PDT pa? Tae yan. Nakakapikon.

Naalala ko tuloy si Dennison. Saktong strict, pero laging maasahan. Pag sya ang nag lead, panatag ka na magiging okay lahat. Bukod don, ang dami nya pang alam. Kawalan talaga ng team ang pag-alis nya.

Gusto ko na yumaman. Iniisip kong mag co-owner ng isang burger business. Pandemic ngayon, I'm sure they were also hit. Sabi ng kakilala ko na co-owner ng business na yon, though affected din sila, hindi naman daw lugi. Iniisip ko kung worth it ba to. Or gamitin ko nalang ba yung pera ko sa mga investments na gamay ko gaya ng stock market. But I'm hoping to have cash flow. Ano ba gagawin ko?

Saan makakarating ang 50k kung ang goal mo e maging financially free? Universe, please enlighten me.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 05:28 PM.

コメントを書く





F*ck PDT
水曜日: May 26, 2021



Nakakawalang gana. Nag endorse ako ng call sa pdt team. Ang angas nung sumagot. Parang utang na loob ko pa na ng endorse ako sa kanila. So I told him na the sole purpose of us being backups e for them not to miss calls. We're helping their team. Not the other way around. Nag message ako kay TL at dun sa mandarambong na hudas na may kagagawan ng ito. Naiirita ko.

Desidido na si Gelo.  Aalis na sya. I wish I can do the same. Of course I can't. And I hate that. Kaya ngayon, I'm doing everything in my power to at least defend myself. Hindi nila magawa ito kay robert dahil reklamador sya. Very well then, I'll be like Robert.

Biglang hindi umattend si Hudas sa training samantalang kahapon pabibo sya. Iwas ata sa issue nung nisend kong message. Nitag pa sya nung maangas na taga PDT. Kala nya naman matatakot ako at uurungan ko sila. Neknek nila. I tagged TL hudas too and even sent screenshots on how that maangas PDT member has treated me. Dahil epal si Hudas, I'm sure he won't act in my favor. Though I've talked to my own TL about this, he didn't seem to have any power at all. So wala akong choice. I'm on my own. Still, I don't want to let this go without putting up a fight. I plan to send an email to the manager. Maybe I can raise it to the HR too if hindi ko magugustuhan ang result. Let's try fighting like Robert. Bahala na.

I hate this. I hate, hate this. I hate that epal Hudas na nagpauso ng lahat ng to. I hate all of them. Arrrrrg!

-----

Election 2022 looks so bad. If Leni won't run, then we've lost our hope.

A divorcee colleague once told me na wag daw mawalan ng pag-asa regarding building a family. Bata pa daw kami and we can still have kids. I truly meant it when I told her I don't want to have one. Putek, anong klaseng kinabukasan ang naghihintay sa magiging anak ko sa hilatcha ng mga nangyayari sa Pilipinas alone. Hindi pa kasama ang buong mundo nyan. Pakers. Parang gusto ko nang mag migrate.

Ayoko kay Pacquiao. Ayoko kay Isko. Ayoko kay Trillianes. At mas lalong ayoko sa anak nung clown. Jusko, eto lang ba talaga ang meron? Jusko.

-----

Yung nararamdaman ko for the company parehas pala sa nararamdaman ko sa Pinas no. I like it here, but the management(government) sucks, so yeah.

Pak this. I really wish I have more choices.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 07:38 PM.

コメントを書く





GB b4 shleep
水曜日: May 26, 2021



Ang cute ng anime na The Way Of A Househusband. Natapos ko yung episodes ng di ko namamalayan.

I like that YouTube kid, Nicole Alba. She's meticulous and always doing her best. Parang si Tacchan ng The Way Of A Househusband.

I want to find that one thing that will make me want to do my best. I miss that feeling so much.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 09:38 PM.

コメントを書く





Saiki
日曜日: May 30, 2021



Pakiramdam ko, sa sobrang pagkabwisit ko sa trabaho, lalo kong naa attract ang kamalasan.

Tumaya ako sa lotto. Ngayong gabi ang bola. Dama kong mananalo ako.

Pag may 46M na ko, pwede na ba ko magresign? Based sa kalkulasyon ko, I can live up to 86yo nang hindi nagtatrabaho while still maintaining the same lifestyle with that much money. Syempre di pa kasama yung kung may nagkasakit or emergency. Syempre wala na kong health card nun...

Pero, not so bad, di ba?

--------

Watching the anime Saiki K. Sobrang laugh trip. Halfway na ko ng season 2, may season 3 pa. Ang sarap mag absent bukas para manood. Pero siguradong malulungkot ako pag natapos ko to.

---------

Nag email na ko sa Manager namin kahapon ng formal complaint sa pagiging PDT backup. Wala pang reply. Siguro dahil weekend din kasi. Naka cc si Hudas pati si TL. 

Sa totoo lang, nakakapagod mainis sa isang tao no? Ayoko ng ganito. 

Sana manalo ko sa lotto mamaya.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 07:50 PM.

コメントを書く





Nijihan
月曜日: May 31, 2021



Nag reply na yung manager sa reklamo ko. May meeting ako with them mamayang 2:30. Tatlo sila, mag isa lang ako. Di naman ako takot. Pero sana parin makuha ko yung terms na gusto ko.

-----

Joke time. Yung ticket ko pala  sa lotto e last Friday pa yung bola. 1 lang nakuha kong number. Oh well, hanap ulet ng ibanh way para yumaman.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 12:05 PM.

コメントを書く





Ohayowww
火曜日: June 1, 2021



6時の勤務は開始した。

Tahimik. Yehey.

So kahapon, kinausap na ako ng boss. The boss is 意外と話しやすい. I didn't get the terms I want. Hudas was as epal as usual. Still I did my best para hindi matapos ang meeting na wala akong napapala. In the end, the boss ordered na tanggalan kami ng PDT skill until we finished the training. Lel. Boss ordered Hudas na siguraduhing matapos to within the week. E 3 sa group namin off ng Thursday and Friday, myself included. Bleh, ayan, dami mo extra work now.

Tinabla ko rin yung sabi nya na ako nalang daw mag relay ng info sa iba. Aba, trabaho nyo yan no. The boss listened. Extra work ulet for Hudas. Haha.

Sa totoo lang, di pala masaya maging difficult employee, or person in general, kagaya ni Robert no?

I also feel like the tiny benefit that I can get from being difficult is not that worth it compared to the peace that I have to sacrifice in order to get it. My peace worth so much more than this.

Kaya, oh sya. Ang mahalaga, wala kaming pdt calls hanggang walang maayos na training at access. I still hate Hudas. Gusto ko syang tirisin. But I guess, I'll just let this go.

--------

Ang hirap matulog kagabi. Nanood din kasi ako ng Saiki. Natapos ko na ang season 2. Nalungkot ako to find out na 2 eps lang ang season 3. At least meron pa nung Saiki Reawaken ata yun. I think that's about 7 eps din. 

Feeling ko, kakanood ko ng anime, mejo nag improve ang Japanese language skills ko. I'm an auditory learner afterall. But the downside is that, my English skills seem to be getting worse.

Sabi nila, to be good in one language, you have to think in that language at least for 30 minutes daily. Ang hirap pala. I realize that most of the time, I don't use any language at all whenever I think. E for effort talaga to. Ewan ko kung nagwowork ba. Ang alam ko lang, ang pangit ng English ko sa meeting ko with the boss kahapon. The boss is an Indian. No choice. English only talaga. I'd like to think that I can speak in English so much better than this. Tokwa. Nakakahiya.

We have more Japanese calls now kesa English. I still suck in Japanese, and my English is getting worse. Alam mo yung multilingual ka, but you suck in all 3 languages. Juice colored. 

If I will watch an English series or movies for some time, I'm pretty sure my skill will improve a great deal. Pero after a while, tokwa, makakalimutan ko na naman.

------

40 minutes na kong avail. Ano bang gagawin ko sa buhay ko? Makapag review na nga lang ng KB ng PDT. Tokwa.



* * * * * * * * *



Written by cinderellaareus at 06:43 AM.

コメントを書く



« 2021/04 · 2021/06 »
C I N D E R E L L A A R E U S
"A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep"

about me

私の名前はZです。

navigate

Home
Archive
Profile
Gallery
Friends
Friendsof
Favorites


credits

template|| Up4Grabs
image 1 ||www.neatorama.com
image 2 || deviantart
KuroKen || Tenor
blog host|| Tabulas
content || cinderellaareus


layout design : izaia_zah






reliable Counter
Web Hits Stat

Real Time Analytics